Eight Arms but No Hands

Avenue 5 1×9

Ryan Clark: Hour? One hour?!
Billie McEvoy: Yes! Or 60 minutes, if a longer-sounding number makes you all feel better.
Herman Judd: For some reason, it does.

Herman Judd: Hey, Matt, it's Judd from work. You're the son I never had... the lover I never wanted.

Herman Judd: How 'bout this tough guy captain, huh? Alpha to the nut sack.
Iris Kimura: Proactive.
Ryan Clark: Yeah, like a yogurt.

Karen Kelly: We will be ruthless.
Iris Kimura: But also, merciless.
Ryan Clark: Um... Aren't those the same thing?
Iris Kimura: No. You need to be both.
Ryan Clark: Oh. Okay.

Ryan Clark: Seriously, my decision to make a quick decision was itself a bad decision. I have the decision-making powers of a pigeon trapped in a library.
Herman Judd: A library. Why... why is the pigeon in the library?
Ryan Clark: I... I saw a pigeon in a library once. It did not make good decisions.

Herman Judd: We tried... You know, you can lead a horse to water, but you can't stop it from throwing itself violently out of an airlock...

Ryan Clark: I'm the captain of a ship that's leaking passengers.

Ryan Clark: Come with me. And you can call me Captain 'cause I think I deserve it this time.

Herman Judd: Why does the fusion drive need an antechamber?
Ryan Clark: I don't know.
Herman Judd: Right. I keep forgetting that.

Ryan Clark: Why do I keep thinking I'm clever? I'm not. On a good day, I'm barely not stupid.

Matt Spencer: I've been itemizing my thoughts. Thought 309: "Every year, we pass the pre-anniversary of our death but we don't even know it, so we don't get presents".

Matt Spencer: Thought 14: "Poor octopus... eight arms, but no hands. Fuck you, God".

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Ryan Clark: He must be headed for the shuttle... Oh, shittle.

Herman Judd: Go, go, go, go, Starbuck!
Paul: Yes, sir.
Herman Judd: Go! Go, go, go!
Paul: Yes, sir. We're going, going, going, going. That button initiates prelaunch. The rest is automated.

Herman Judd: No! Me? Why?
Jordan Hatwal: Uh, well, in order: hatred, yes, you, and because you contemplated mass murder.

Herman Judd: On second thought, what's six months anyway? I was in my mom's womb longer than that.

Herman Judd: Boom. The hero returns.

Karen Kelly: Whoa. What's that?
Ryan Clark: It's a bag with some of my friend in it.
Karen Kelly: Okay... You're gonna need a cool bag because that will drip.

Matt Spencer: You're very unhappy. You know that thing you do where you act sarcastic so we all feel sorry for you? It works. We do.

Ryan Clark: Well, I am moved by your faith. And then your lack of it. And now, your indifference.

Paul: You know, you've been my least favorite so far.
Jordan Hatwal: Well, you're not exactly Audrey Hepburn, are you?

Ryan Clark: This is like psychosis, but without any of the advantages.

Frank Kelly: That's the woman who made me marry her!

Ryan Clark: No, the whole point is to jettison from the back of the ship 'cause that's what pushes you forwards, in the direction you wanna go. You've gotta... shit out of the back of the ship. This is basic shitting!
Billie McEvoy: Even babies know that, Karen. They shit out the back pretty consistently.

Rav Mulcair: Does no one teach physics in America?!

Karen Kelly: I feel like I'm dying and my teeth are falling out!

Cyrus: On our new trajectory...
Karen Kelly: I don't wanna hear this.

Cyrus: ...... eight years.

Karen Kelly: I need you to do something really bad so that everybody looks at you and not at me, okay?

Spike Martin: I wonder which will go first, the mind or the body?... My money's on the mind.

Matt Spencer: Eight years! That's longer than the Beatles were together!! That's longer than the Seven Years' War!!!

Herman Judd: Iris! You think she can hear me?
Ryan Clark: No. But you may as well keep screaming.

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