Where Is Josh's Friend?

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend 2×1

& Rebecca: ...it was a brilliant argument. It was better than Sullivan v. the State of New York City, in which I proved that black mold actually raises SAT scores.
    Paula: Brilliant rhetoric, but if it had actually worked, he’d be sleeping in your bed right now and he’s not.

& Paula: Honey, he’s just there for the sex. He’s exploiting you. He’s... he’s effsploiting you. He’s effsplo... oh, that’s real... that’s really good. I just came up with that. I should monetize that. Should I buy an «url»?
    Rebecca: No, it’s «U-R-L.»
    Paula: And is it jif or gif?
    Rebecca: Nobody knows.

& Rebecca: And, Paula, he’s not effsploiting me. If anything, he’s, um... respeffing me. Yes. He’s respeffing the hell out of me.

---

& Paula: Do you remember when I found out you were sleeping with Greg, in the hospital? I screamed at you so hard, I strained my groin.

& Rebecca: Do you not want the plain hummus?
    Marco: Ugh, no. Who eats plain hummus?

& Paula: I’m addicted to her life. It’s like the high I get from those vampire novels, or The Bachelor, or when I write a really great legal brief at work.

& Rebecca: What’s this?
    Paula: Okay, this is just a simple contract laying out the terms of our friendship. It stipulates that my services as a friend are limited to consultation and support, and excludes shenanigans. So you just need to sign here, here, and... here. Initial there, there, and there.

--
On the IMDb

+ Soundtracks!