It's a Khanderful Life

Citizen Khan 5×7

& Mr. Khan: Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas, Mr Khan! I’m not a community leader and nobody knows me.

& Dave: So what do you think is wrong with him, then?
    Riaz: Well, if you ask me, it all goes back to when he first moved to Sparkhill...
    Mr. Khan: The year was 1989, when Band Aid were top of the Christmas charts again. A flight to Pakistan cost only £149. £199 if you wanted an actual seat.
    Narrator: And the world was Mr Khan’s oyster.

& Dave: We’ve got a cross-faith committee led by a rabbi, a priest and an imam.
    Mr. Khan: Is this some kind of joke?

& Mr. Khan: What’s a rabbi doing here?! We don’t have anything in common with these people, Dave. Apart from... snippy-snipping.

& Mr. Khan: Has this got anything to do with Prince Harry? I bet it is Prince Harry. This is a ginger crony conspiracy!

& Dave: You’re invited, too.
    Mr. Khan: What a wonderful gesture! Merry Christmas. And a happy Hanukkah-schmonikka to you, too.

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& Mr. Khan: Alia, sweetie, the Queen doesn’t do «selfies». She does «onesies». Imagine, the Queen and me in a onesie together...

& Mr. Khan: Look, Mrs... Whoever you are.
Angel: Well, I suppose you could call me... Angel-a.
    Mr. Khan: Right.
    Angel: Or Angel-ena. Or Angel-ica. I’m saying... I’m an angel. You know, from heaven.

& Mr. Khan: I’m a nobody. I should never have moved to Sparkhill.
    Angel: What if you never did?.. I’m going to show you what Sparkhill would be like without you. ....
    Mr. Khan: And they say Muslims are weird.

& Angel: What do you think?
    Mr. Khan: Is this... heaven?
    Angel: No, it’s a pound shop.
    Mr. Khan: It looks like heaven to me!

& Mr. Khan: I want to live in Sparkhill! I want to live in Sparkhill!

& Mr. Khan: Oh, Riaz. Don’t take this the wrong way... but I love you!

& Mr. Khan: Merry Christmas, everyone!

& Mr. Khan: There’s only one palace I want to be in. And I’m standing in it right now, right here, in Sparkhill.

& Mr. Khan: You know, this is the best Christmas ever. I’ve learned... that people you love are all that matters. And in our own small way... we can all make a difference in this world. Isn’t that right?
    Mo: A doggy!
    Mr. Khan: Exactly.

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On the IMDb