Chirp

Modern Family 2×7

& Phil: ’Changing the battery in a smoke detector is what they teach you in Man 101... so, of course, every time I hear that noise, all I hear is... "Beep, beep. You’re not a man. Beep, beep. You’re not"...’

& Luke: Hey, Dad, I think I found a place online where I can sell this organ. Can you drive me to the black market?
Phil: I think they mean a different kind of organ, buddy.

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& Phil: I can handle this. Just need the ol’ burglar basher.
Claire: Is that your college cheerleading baton?
Phil: Not when you’re on the business end of it.

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