The War Against Gingivitis

Two and a Half Men 9×18

& Alan: Oh, damn! What password did I use for this? Um... Uh, Jake. Nope. Um... Jake-1.....

& Bridget: How do you explain him to people?
    Walden: I usually tell people that my wife drove me to homosexuality.

---

& Billy: Who are you?
    Alan: Oh, yeah, I’m Walden’s friend... confidante, mentor, gatekeeper.
    Billy: Oh, yeah, Bridget told me about you. Yeah, the leech.
    Alan: Alan Harper. Pleased to meet you.

& Walden: Sometimes peeing’s better than sex.
    Billy: Absolutely. Although, when I was smoking crack, a lot of times peeing and sex were the same thing.

--
On the IMDb