& Melanie: If I were to find out how depressing and demeaning whatever the fuck it is you do here, I might be forced to feel sorry for you.
Simon: Right. Well, I look forward to it.
& Simon: Mom?.. No, it’s just a night terror... No, that didn’t ever happen... I know I’m a disappointment... I have to go now. I’m with a girl... Yes, a female girl... I don’t know if she’s fertile.
& Harris: Yeah yeah, you look just like him.
Simon: Yes, I do, don’t I?
Harris: Yeah, and you’re not even Chinese. It’s pretty fucked up.
Simon: Yes, it is that. Now now why didn’t you notice?
Harris: Well, no offence, mate, but... you’re pretty unnoticeable. Bit of a non-person.
& James: So what’s the problem?
Simon: I don’t know. I have all these things that I want to say to her, like... like how I can tell that she’s a lonely person, even if other people can’t. ’Cause... ’cause I know what it feels like to be lost and lonely and invisible.
& James: Simon, you have to go after what you want. I would tear the asshole off an elephant for a piece of trim I wanted that bad.
& Simon: I don’t know how to be myself. It’s like I’m permanently outside myself. Like... like you could push your hand straight through me if you wanted to. And I couldn’t see the type of man that I wanna be versus the type of man I actually am. And I know that I’m doing it, but I’m incapable of doing what needs to be done. I’m like Pinocchio. I’m a wooden boy, not a real boy. And it kills me.
& James: But you need to realize that data entry and collection and computers and stuff, it can be sensual. It does have a romance. It can be sexy. All these lives that we’re recording, their hopes, their dreams, their loves... each person out there, apart yet connected. We’re giving these faceless people immortality.
Melanie: Wow. That’s an amazing way of looking at it.
& James: When you’re walking with a woman or standing next to one, you wanna put your hand on their lower back, not the ass... They sometimes get upset about that... but just above it. It shows you’re interested, but you can push them down the stairs at any moment.
Simon: Why?
James: Because you’ve got leverage.
Simon: So wait, here?.. What?!
James: Stop that. That’s gay.
Simon: But you just did it to me.
James: Yes, but it was me. Do you see the difference?
& James: You can’t be doing anything gay. No ice-cream cones.
Simon: I like ice cream. It’s delicious.
James: Ice cream is fine in a cup, but in a cone is gay unless you’re with a woman at the time.
Simon: Anything else?
James: No riding on a motorcycle with another man. Exceptions are drive-by shootings, bomb throwings and purse snatchings. Anything else is gay.
Simon: You know a lot about this.
& James: Defense wins championships. You need to tell them how great you are all the time, which means make things up.
Simon: What if they find out?
James: Make it hard to research, like you were the captain of a Jai-Alai team or a brigadier general in the navy. Something like that.
Simon: I don’t think anybody would believe that.
James: Then change the subject and deny everything.
Simon: I just don’t know if that’s me.
James: That’s why it’s so good.
& PT Kommandor: You don’t exist any more.
Simon: Excuse me?
PT Kommandor: You’re no longer on the system.
Simon: Well, just put me back in the system.
PT Kommandor: I can’t put you back in the system.
Simon: Why?
PT Kommandor: Because you don’t exist. I can’t put someone who doesn’t exist in the system.
Simon: But I used to be in the system.
PT Kommandor: Not according to the system. In fact, according to the system, you’ve never existed.
Simon: How reliable is the system?
PT Kommandor: Hey, it’s completely reliable.
Simon: Yes, but I used to exist... I do exist! I’m standing in this room, aren’t I?
PT Kommandor: And?
& Simon: I need to see the Colonel. The Colonel will understand.
& The Colonel: There aren’t too many like you. Are there, Simon?
Simon: I’d like to think I’m pretty unique.
--
On the IMDb
Simon: Right. Well, I look forward to it.
& Simon: Mom?.. No, it’s just a night terror... No, that didn’t ever happen... I know I’m a disappointment... I have to go now. I’m with a girl... Yes, a female girl... I don’t know if she’s fertile.
& Harris: Yeah yeah, you look just like him.
Simon: Yes, I do, don’t I?
Harris: Yeah, and you’re not even Chinese. It’s pretty fucked up.
Simon: Yes, it is that. Now now why didn’t you notice?
Harris: Well, no offence, mate, but... you’re pretty unnoticeable. Bit of a non-person.
& James: So what’s the problem?
Simon: I don’t know. I have all these things that I want to say to her, like... like how I can tell that she’s a lonely person, even if other people can’t. ’Cause... ’cause I know what it feels like to be lost and lonely and invisible.
& James: Simon, you have to go after what you want. I would tear the asshole off an elephant for a piece of trim I wanted that bad.
& Simon: I don’t know how to be myself. It’s like I’m permanently outside myself. Like... like you could push your hand straight through me if you wanted to. And I couldn’t see the type of man that I wanna be versus the type of man I actually am. And I know that I’m doing it, but I’m incapable of doing what needs to be done. I’m like Pinocchio. I’m a wooden boy, not a real boy. And it kills me.
& James: But you need to realize that data entry and collection and computers and stuff, it can be sensual. It does have a romance. It can be sexy. All these lives that we’re recording, their hopes, their dreams, their loves... each person out there, apart yet connected. We’re giving these faceless people immortality.
Melanie: Wow. That’s an amazing way of looking at it.
& James: When you’re walking with a woman or standing next to one, you wanna put your hand on their lower back, not the ass... They sometimes get upset about that... but just above it. It shows you’re interested, but you can push them down the stairs at any moment.
Simon: Why?
James: Because you’ve got leverage.
Simon: So wait, here?.. What?!
James: Stop that. That’s gay.
Simon: But you just did it to me.
James: Yes, but it was me. Do you see the difference?
& James: You can’t be doing anything gay. No ice-cream cones.
Simon: I like ice cream. It’s delicious.
James: Ice cream is fine in a cup, but in a cone is gay unless you’re with a woman at the time.
Simon: Anything else?
James: No riding on a motorcycle with another man. Exceptions are drive-by shootings, bomb throwings and purse snatchings. Anything else is gay.
Simon: You know a lot about this.
& James: Defense wins championships. You need to tell them how great you are all the time, which means make things up.
Simon: What if they find out?
James: Make it hard to research, like you were the captain of a Jai-Alai team or a brigadier general in the navy. Something like that.
Simon: I don’t think anybody would believe that.
James: Then change the subject and deny everything.
Simon: I just don’t know if that’s me.
James: That’s why it’s so good.
& PT Kommandor: You don’t exist any more.
Simon: Excuse me?
PT Kommandor: You’re no longer on the system.
Simon: Well, just put me back in the system.
PT Kommandor: I can’t put you back in the system.
Simon: Why?
PT Kommandor: Because you don’t exist. I can’t put someone who doesn’t exist in the system.
Simon: But I used to be in the system.
PT Kommandor: Not according to the system. In fact, according to the system, you’ve never existed.
Simon: How reliable is the system?
PT Kommandor: Hey, it’s completely reliable.
Simon: Yes, but I used to exist... I do exist! I’m standing in this room, aren’t I?
PT Kommandor: And?
& Simon: I need to see the Colonel. The Colonel will understand.
& The Colonel: There aren’t too many like you. Are there, Simon?
Simon: I’d like to think I’m pretty unique.
--
On the IMDb
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