13 Sins

& Father: You sealed all our fates when you settled on a liberal arts major. Mythology and Folklore. What the fuck were you thinking?
    Elliot: If I just had more time...
    Father: You had 15 years by my count! Fifteen years to find something you were good at. By the time I was your age, I’d amassed a fortune so huge, it took decades of dedicated self-destruction to wind up like this.

& Gameshow Host: You can have your privacy back right now, if you like. But I must tell you, great wealth is within your grasp. Thirty-six hours from now, you can be a very rich man. All you have to do is complete 13 challenges. You’ve already completed two, so only 11 more to go.

& Gameshow Host: Two paths lie before you. One requires a bit of courage and leads to enough money to settle your debts, keep Michael safe, and provide your child everything from a pony to a college education. The other leads to loveless poverty. All that requires is you just continue being you.

& Gameshow Host: You’re facing at least ten years in prison for arson, assault, and desecration of a corpse. But here’s the good news. If you successfully complete all 13 challenges, we will make all these charges go away. It’s what we do for winners. Losers, however, are on their own.

& Gameshow Host: Try to think of this in the most positive, empowering way as a gun pointed to your head.

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& Gameshow Host: Challenge ten of 13 is a worth a half million dollars. All you have to do is wait until you’re called upon to give a toast and then destroy the wedding hall, while singing “The Internationale...”

& Gameshow Host: You’ve committed six felonies. Any future with Shelby, indeed, any future not organized around routine sodomy, now depends on you completing all 13 challenges.

& Chilcoat: You think this is a game? You get shot, that’s gonna end the fun pretty quick.

& Chilcoat: If you don’t want to be found, you can’t just switch off your phone. You gotta take the battery out.

& Vogler: You see, that’s the true objective of the game, the spectacle of transformation. To show that anyone can be turned into a monster.

& Elliot: That’s it?
    Old woman: No.

& Vogler: Sometimes... Sometimes I think about how few people on this planet really decide everything. One percent of one percent. They are the functional equivalent of gods. They must get... bored.

& Chilcoat: How does it end? This game?
    Vogler: Thirteen is the end. Thirteen never changes. Some contestants think they can walk away, but it’s a snuff shell. There’s only one way those end.

& Father: Thirteen is the tough one. Bit of a leap there.

& Chilcoat: It’s pretty much Hamlet in here.

& Shelby: As if things weren’t insane enough, somebody called and offered me $6,000 to eat a fly.
    Elliot: What did you say?!
    Shelby: What did I say? Are you kidding?..

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