The Big Bang Theory 6×11
Penny: Really? That's how you're gonna spend your Saturday night?
Leonard: Oh, come on, I hardly ever get a chance to play anymore...
Penny: Oh, you poor thing. Is having a real-life girlfriend who has sex with you getting in the way of your board games?
Leonard: Little bit, yeah.
& Sheldon: You're not invited.
Amy: Why not?
Sheldon: Amy, from time to time, we men need to break free from the shackles of civility and get in touch with our primal animalistic selves.
Amy: By rolling dice and playing make-believe with little figurines?
Sheldon: Yeah, like a bunch of savages.
& Howard: I have to play Dungeons and Dragons... for the marriage.
Bernadette: You're an idiot!
Howard: I'm your idiot. Forever.
& Raj: So, listen, I know we talked about getting a bite to eat in Silver Lake, and then seeing the Christmas lights in Griffith Park, but Leonard's talking about a big D and D game at his place.
Stuart: Saturday night just went from crazy to epic! Woo-hoo!
& Sheldon: You know I don't enjoy Christmas.
Stuart: What's wrong with Christmas?
Sheldon: Oh, where to begin? Trees indoors... Overuse of the words "'tis" and "'twas." And the absurd custom of one stocking. Everyone knows socks belong in pairs. Who uses one sock?..
Howard: Pirate with a peg leg?
Sheldon: Actually... that helps, thank you.
& Sheldon: Oh, a scroll. I like scrolls. They're my third favorite system of transmitting the written word. After stone tablets and skywriting.
& Sheldon: Mixing Dungeons and Dragons with Christmas is like making a sandwich of grape jelly, the best-tasting jelly, and petroleum jelly, the worst-tasting jelly.
& Raj: Oh, man, the first monster I see, I'm gonna sneak up behind him, whip out my wand, and shoot my magic all over his ass!
Stuart: Do you hear yourself when you say these things?
& Sheldon: I know they're making a rhetorical point, I just don't know what it is.
& Raj: Uh, wait, can I come with you? My character died...
Bernadette: Sorry, Raj, it's girls' night out.
Penny: Maybe another time... ..... Okay. Come on.
Raj: Ooh! Girls' night, girls' night!
Stuart: How does he not hear that?
& Amy: Are we gonna teach our fellas a lesson by getting stinking drunk, luring strange men into the bathroom, and turning the toilet stall into a temple of the senses?
& Bernadette: Hey, let's help Raj meet a girl tonight.
Penny: Okay, wait, are we talking one-night stand or do we want to get him into a relationship?
Amy: Let's get him laid!
& Raj: Okay. Well, a couple of things. Don't tell them I come from money. I want them to love me for me. And... They must be insanely hot. Like, nines or tens.
Penny: Nines or tens?!
Raj: Okay, an eight is acceptable if she's willing to bring another eight to the hot tub.
Bernadette: Bottom line: you'll take any woman who'll have you, right?
& Stuart: I don't remember you buying these miniatures in my store...
Leonard: Oh, uh, yeah. I got 'em on Amazon.
Stuart: Sure. I get it. Why support a friend when you can support a multinational conglomerate that is crushing the life out of that friend?
& Penny: So, how'd it go?
Raj: Great. I bought her a couple of drinks, and she gave me her e-mail address.
Penny: Ooh!
Bernadette: "Jennifer@not-even-if-you-were-the-last-guy-on-earth.loser"
& Raj: It's true. I'm always attracted to women I can't have. I do it all the time. I did the same thing with the two of you...
Amy: The two of them? I don't understand.
& Sheldon:
♪ Ye who now will bless the poor ♪
♪ Shall yourselves find blessing ♪
♪ Ba-da-bum. ♪
Howard: Done?
Sheldon: I think the word you're looking for is "bravo."
& Raj: Sometimes I get so lonely, I sit on my left hand until it goes numb, then I put it in my right hand and pretend I'm holding hands with another person.
& Howard: Yes, we found Santa! Christmas is saved!.. Don't ever tell my mother I said that.
& Leonard: Okay. So Wolowitz and Stuart are paralyzed, Santa's dead... and I picked this over having sex with my girlfriend.
& Santa: Close your eyes.
Sheldon: Oh, I hope it's a train...
Santa: Oh, it's better than a train.
Sheldon: Two trains?
Santa: Better.
Sheldon: I'm getting three trains!
& Santa: Ho, ho, ho, ya big dork!
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On the IMDb
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