Tethics

Silicon Valley 6×5

Russ: It's gonna be like Burning Man, except I'll make a fuckton of money.
Gilfoyle: So, _Earning_ Man?

Russ: There's no internet in the middle of the desert, Richard. Maybe that's why no one lives out there. I don't know, I'm not an archaeologist.

Richard: It's weird. I actually don't know what to do when things are going well. It is not natural.

Gavin: A code of conduct, authored by me, that pledges them to a universal ethos, which I created, that I call, "tech ethics," or, "tethics" for short.

Gilfoyle: Absolutely not.
Monica: We haven't told you what we want yet.
Gilfoyle: Irrelevant.

Tracy: I'd like to tell you how you're doing—
Gilfoyle: I know how I'm doing. I'm fucking killing it. I'm building great shit out there.

Tracy: It's your interpersonal rating I'd like to drill down on. It's at 1.5. Your coworkers find you unapproachable, rude, and capable of great hurt with an unsettling stare.
Gilfoyle: Okay.

Gilfoyle: Tracy. I appreciate you wanting to participate in the world of numbers. I find it endearing. But yours are horseshit. They measure nothing.

Gilfoyle: Two days. All 10's.

Richard: Okay, cool. So, Facebook is calling us untethical.
Becky:Yeah, because they signed the pledge.
Danny: So did Google and Amazon and Twitter.

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Michael: Look, have you read his pledge?
Richard: No, of course not. It's trash.
Michael: The first line says, "We, the undersigned, promise to make best efforts to," blah, blah, blah. Best efforts, Richard. It's totally toothless.
Richard: Yes. Exactly, Michael. That's entirely my point. It's all empty bullshit. It means nothing.
Michael: Then who the fuck cares, Richard? Do not fuck this all up over a pointless moral stand! Sign the fucking pledge!

Holden: You're just trying to creep me out so that I'll quit.
Jared: What? I mean, why wouldn't somebody be nice to you? Are you a piece of shit?

Gavin: How could I allow you to add your name to my tethics pledge? That would be... untethical.

Gavin: Wear pants you can kneel in.

Gilfoyle: Monica... gaining someone's confidence is easy. Appear open and interested by mimicking their body language and repeating what they say back to them.
Monica: So, you just repeat what they say?
Gilfoyle: I just repeat what they say.

Gilfoyle: I was social engineering them. Once trust is established, the social engineer simply offers up information, and the subject will reciprocate: pets names, kids names, birthdays. Then, that information is entered into a word list generator. Pop it with their hash into John The Ripper, and within minutes, you have their passwords.
Monica: So, you're just gonna change all your scores to 10's?
Gilfoyle: Yep.

Gavin: Should've taken the $10 million, Richard. Enjoy the injunction, thumbass.

Russ: So, bitches, what do you think?
Dinesh: It's beautiful...
Russ: Tres Commas! Boom!

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