& Megan: I am going backwards! I am Benjamin Button-ing!
& Faiza: I say ... get on that dating site, pick a cute guy. No drinks, no dinner, just a hook-up.
Megan: You can’t order it, it’s not edible arrangements!
Faiza: Yeah, you can. You have tits and the Internet.
& Megan: All right, we’ll try again, but there are rules. No upsetting questions.
Alec: I didn’t realize it was one.
Megan: Well, now you do.
Alec: Okay, I am trying very hard to think of a question that could in no way be construed as upsetting...... Do you like dogs?
Megan: Perfectly non-upsetting question, good job... yes. I like dogs.
& Megan: Do you like your job?
Alec: Since when are you supposed to like your job? I think our generation catastrophically misunderstands that.
& Megan: You are an asshole in so many languages!
& Alec: I’m good. I’m like Teflon, baby, nothing sticks to me.
& Alec: Ambition is such bullshit. Seriously, it’s just chasing vapor, like... whatever it is that you think that you need like that job or that gold star, blue ribbon, fancy desk, nice office, like it doesn’t... like once you get that, you’re going to be confused because you’re not going to be as happy as you thought you were going to be. Then you’re going to be sitting there being like, «Why aren’t I happy? I have this... I got the desk.» Because there’s another desk. Like there’s always going to be something more that your ambition is telling you that you need, so it’s the next thing, and then when you get that, there’s another thing. It’s an endless cycle. You’re forced into retirement. You’re kicking and screaming. Next thing you know, you’re in a big house, you’ve got four-and-a-half bathrooms, you don’t even have a ping-pong table and you’re dead.
& Alec: He has no idea how rare you are.
& Megan: Please be a cross-dresser.
& Megan: You don’t understand. This guy is a psychopath. He’s setting me up! He is setting this whole thing up! Which I realize is exactly what a crazy person would say but that explains my situation. He is so crazy that he is forcing me to sound crazy.
--
+ quotes on the IMDb
& Faiza: I say ... get on that dating site, pick a cute guy. No drinks, no dinner, just a hook-up.
Megan: You can’t order it, it’s not edible arrangements!
Faiza: Yeah, you can. You have tits and the Internet.
& Megan: All right, we’ll try again, but there are rules. No upsetting questions.
Alec: I didn’t realize it was one.
Megan: Well, now you do.
Alec: Okay, I am trying very hard to think of a question that could in no way be construed as upsetting...... Do you like dogs?
Megan: Perfectly non-upsetting question, good job... yes. I like dogs.
& Megan: Do you like your job?
Alec: Since when are you supposed to like your job? I think our generation catastrophically misunderstands that.
& Megan: You are an asshole in so many languages!
& Alec: I’m good. I’m like Teflon, baby, nothing sticks to me.
& Alec: Ambition is such bullshit. Seriously, it’s just chasing vapor, like... whatever it is that you think that you need like that job or that gold star, blue ribbon, fancy desk, nice office, like it doesn’t... like once you get that, you’re going to be confused because you’re not going to be as happy as you thought you were going to be. Then you’re going to be sitting there being like, «Why aren’t I happy? I have this... I got the desk.» Because there’s another desk. Like there’s always going to be something more that your ambition is telling you that you need, so it’s the next thing, and then when you get that, there’s another thing. It’s an endless cycle. You’re forced into retirement. You’re kicking and screaming. Next thing you know, you’re in a big house, you’ve got four-and-a-half bathrooms, you don’t even have a ping-pong table and you’re dead.
& Alec: He has no idea how rare you are.
& Megan: Please be a cross-dresser.
& Megan: You don’t understand. This guy is a psychopath. He’s setting me up! He is setting this whole thing up! Which I realize is exactly what a crazy person would say but that explains my situation. He is so crazy that he is forcing me to sound crazy.
--
+ quotes on the IMDb
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