A Slight at the Opera

Modern Family 4×14

& Luke: Hey, dad, you coming to my play tonight?
    Alex: «Your» play? You only painted the sets.
    Luke: Yeah, and Michelangelo «only» painted the sixteenth chapel.
    Alex: Maybe don’t keep your face so close to the paint cans.

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& Claire: Are you not the least bit sorry? I could have broken a toe.
    Phil: Honey, I’m sorry for dozens of things every day that actually happen. If I start apologizing for things that don’t happen, how productive of a person would I be?

& Jay: First rule of golf... Shh.

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