The Deductionist

Elementary 1×14

& Holmes: Never been robbed by people in their underwear before.

& Watson: I remember this. They called him the Peeler.
    Holmes: Ridiculous.
    Watson: Why is it ridiculous? Didn’t he skin people?
    Holmes: It’s ridiculous to give the man a clever little nickname. It lends an air of omniscience* that these people in no way deserve. You’ve met serial murderers. They’re duller than the Queen’s jubilee. Mouth-breathers and chronic onanists, the lot of them.

& Watson: She predicted your drug problem. So what? You got clean. You picked up your career right where you left off. And you even made a friend, something that Kathryn claimed in her article was virtually impossible. ...
    Holmes: .....
    Watson: Me. I’m talking about me.

& Watson: My point is that... the only thing that anyone can predict about people with 100% certainty is that they’ll change. And anyone who thinks otherwise is kidding themselves. Oh, my God. Is that...
    Holmes: You have a lovely home, Watson. Excellent light.

---

& Holmes: I thought your pornography might distract me.
    Watson: It’s not my pornography.
    Holmes: The sex, I’m sorry to say, is quite mundane. And even if it wasn’t, the continuity gaffes* make it virtually unwatchable.
    Watson: What are you talking about?
    Holmes: Note the clock... 11:20 here. 1:00 there. 11:20 again. And many others. If I were you, I wouldn’t be upset that a dirty movie was produced in my home; I would be upset that it was produced so sloppily.

& Holmes: I’m in a hurry. Shall I select your undergarments as well?

& Holmes: Personally, I hope you go for the gun. If you do, it’ll prove that Drummond was wrong about you, and if she was wrong about you being a coward...
    Ennis: Then maybe she’s wrong about how you’ll end up, too. Maybe you won’t die after turning back to drugs to dull those senses that just won’t quite shut down. Is that what you’re terrified of?
    Holmes: That and clowns.

& Holmes: Oh, uh, I got you something... To replace the one desecrated by a sex act.
    Watson: Thanks.
    Holmes: It gets better...
    Watson: I don’t understand. Nobody did anything to my toothbrush in that movie.
    Holmes: Not in the movie no, certainly not.
    Watson: I’m confused, are you saying that you did something to my toothbrush?.. Sherlock?!

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omniscience — всезнание; всеведение
gaffe — оплошность; ошибка

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