A Musty Crypt and a Stick to Pee On

Young Sheldon 4×5

Adult Sheldon: As long as I can remember, unlocking the mechanisms that govern the physical universe was my greatest passion.
Mary: Whatcha workin' on?
Sheldon: Dungeons & Dragons. Hey, even Hawking took a roll through the park once in a while.

Mary: You know how I feel about that game.
Sheldon: I'm aware, which is why the most wicked thing in it is my sense of humor.
Mary: I still don't like it. But you are playing with other kids, so I'll take it as a win.

Adult Sheldon: Not just playing with other kids, controlling every aspect of their destiny as their Dungeon Master overlord. I didn't believe in God but I sure loved acting like one.

Connie: Dale's trying to be a better person, and... it's weird.
Mary: Weird how?
Connie: Just doesn't seem natural.
Mary: I don't follow.
Connie: Like when you see a dancing bear at the circus, and you know it just wants to rip some clown's head off.
Mary: That's graphic.

Georgie: Just out of curiosity, when exactly are you and Mom leaving, and when exactly are y'all coming back?
George: You're not bringing your girlfriend here.
Georgie: Excuse me for taking an interest in your life.

George: Look, I used to be your age, but can you try thinking with your brain for once?
Georgie: If you used to be my age, I think you know the answer to that.

Mary: Are you gonna behave like this all weekend?!
George: What? Responsible and fun-loving? Probably.
Mary: You are such a... monkey butt.

Dale: So what's Sheldon like?
Missy: A pain in the ass.
Meemaw: No, he means, what does Sheldon like on his pizza?

Dale: We can play it with you.
Meemaw: Really?
Meemaw: Dale, that's nice, but... I don't think you'll like it.
Dale: Afraid I might beat you?
Sheldon: Actually, there's no one winner. It's a cooperative game where you use your imagination to explore a fantasy world with the help of the Dungeon Master's preplanned scenarios and the rolling of polyhedral dice.
Meemaw: Still sound fun?
Dale: Yeah. Sorta.

Dale: So, how does this work?
Sheldon: You start by creating your character.
Missy: I want to be a Ninja Turtle Princess of Power!
Meemaw: Put me down for that, too.
Sheldon: You have to choose from one of the character classes. There's thief, druid, paladin, wizard...

George: Can you guys not do that?
Wayne: Do what?
George: Be so happy. You're married. Act like it.

Georgie: What a relief.
Jana: I know...
Georgie: We better stop hugging, or you're gonna need another stick to pee on.

Wayne: Now, let's hear how much you appreciate me for fixing your marriage.

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