Uncle Kolya: There are no miracles here, Pavel.
Pavel: Sorry, Uncle Kolya. Let me think a second.
Uncle Kolya: I'm telling you, don't think or you'll get a bad headache.
Uncle Kolya: How many women have you had? If you count all of them, starting from high school.
Pavel: Two.
Uncle Kolya: Oh, yeah? Seriously? Just two? That's hilarious. I mean, I'd get it if you only had, like, one. But two is like sitting on the fence.
Irina: What's your prescription?
Pavel: Uh, my shrink gives me Xanax, Alprazolam...
Irina: I was talking about your eyesight.
Pavel: Oh. Negative four.
Irina: Do you think… this epidemic will be over soon? Do you?
Pavel: I'm afraid it hasn't even started yet.
Misha: Can I leave my socks on?
Polina: It was amazing.
Misha: Thank you.
Polina: I was being sarcastic, Misha.
Misha: Thank you, anyway.
Polina: You're welcome.
—
On the IMDb
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