The One Percent Solution

Elementary 2×16

& Holmes: ...I believe that, by this time, several days hence, Romulus and Remus will be living side by side, two cocks in harmony.
    Watson: All right. Good luck. I’m not feeding them.
    Holmes: You seem upset. Do you have an aversion to cocks?
    Watson: Not as a species. I have an aversion to these particular... You know what? I’m not 12. I’m not calling them that. Feed your roosters.

& Holmes: I refuse, on principle, to work with anyone who would willingly refer to themselves as a “czar.”

& Lestrade: I got awful lots of work, got chat show interviews. You know, they even asked me to do one of those DOUG Chats about the science of deduction.
    Holmes: DOUG Chat?
    Lestrade: Wait. You never heard of a DOUG chat?.. Well, they’re like these conferences about the spread of ideas.

& Holmes: Are we hunting game, or are we fishing for sharks? ’Cause you can’t have it both ways, metaphorically speaking.

& Lestrade: I meant what I said earlier around about Richard Balsille being a-a great man, but unfortunately, that doesn’t always mean a good one.

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& Watson: I think Lestrade just tried to recruit me.
    Holmes: “When you’ve eliminated the impossible...” Hmm.

& Holmes: I spent several minutes last night trying to to work out Lestrade’s password.
    Watson: Birthday?
    Holmes: The year Tottenham last won the FA Cup. Ages ago, by the way.

& Lestrade: Look, I was embarrassed, Sherlock. Is that so difficult to get your brain around?.. No, I wanted you to think that I was getting by on talent alone. ... I mean, you thought that I was... a fool before. What do you think now?

& Watson: The FBI has had a task force searching for Aurelius for years. You think you’re just going to look through a bunch of NYPD files and find him, just like that?.. Hmm. Of course you do.

& Watson: Why is Romulus outside my door?
    Holmes: That’s Remus.
    Watson: I don’t care which cock I’m holding, I just want to know how it got there. ... Okay, congratulations. You got me to say it.
    Holmes: I don’t know if you’ve settled on an epitaph yet, but it does occur to me that would look fantastic on a tombstone.

& Holmes: That’s the difference between you and her. You spend your time resenting my abilities, and she spends her time developing her own. If you’d had done the same, you might’ve built a practice you were proud of.

& Holmes: Well... in a moment, the world will either have an efficient means of curing fighting cocks, or we will have the raw ingredients for chicken dinner.

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