The One in Barbados

Friends 9×23-24

David: Why did Phoebe and Mike break up?
Chandler: Oh, because his penis was too big... I'm sorry. That's the kind of thing I do.

Monica: Chandler, we have talked about this. You are not supposed to give people advice! Couldn't you have made some inappropriate joke?
Chandler: I did! A penis one! Just so I know, what was so wrong about what I said?

Chandler: Isn't an engagement ring supposed to have a diamond? Oh, there it is.
David: Yes, well, being a failed scientist... doesn't pay quite as well as you might think. That's one-seventieth of a carat. And the clarity is quite poor.
Chandler: Nice.

Chandler: If Phoebe wants to marry David, she should. I'm not gonna stand in the way of that. Neither should you.
Monica: You don't tell me what to do. I tell you what to do.

Chandler: Meddler! Meddler!
Monica: If you hadn't meddled to start with... then I wouldn't have had to go in and meddle myself. No matter how much we meddle, we'll never be able to unmeddle... the thing that you meddled up in the first place!

Joey: Stupid rain. We can't do anything.
Rachel: Well, I brought some books. We could read.
Joey: Hey, it hasn't come to that yet.

Joey: Erectus?
Rachel: Homo.
Joey: Right.

Phoebe: I'll play if we don't keep score.
Monica: Well, then how do we know who wins?
Phoebe: Nobody wins.
Monica: So we're just four losers. Super.

Monica: Oh, my God. You're good... It's like watching porn.
Chandler: And that's how it's done!

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+ Quotes (9×23) on the IMDb
+ Quotes (9×24) on the IMDb
+ Soundtracks (9×23)
+ Soundtracks (9×24)