The Big Lebowski (1998)

The Stranger: They call Los Angeles The City of Angels. I didn't find it to be that exactly.

The Dude: You know, this is the fucking guy I could find this fucking Lebowski guy.
Donny: His name is Lebowski? That's your name, Dude.
The Dude: This is the guy who should compensate me for the fucking rug. His wife goes out and owes money all over town, and they pee on my rug?
Walter Sobchak: They pee on your fucking rug.
The Dude: They pee on my fucking rug.
Walter Sobchak: That's right, Dude. They peed on your fucking rug.

The Big Lebowski: Are you employed, Mr. Lebowski?
The Dude: Uh, wait, let me let me explain something to you. I am not Mr. Lebowski. You're Mr. Lebowski. I'm The Dude. So that's what you call me, you know. That or, his Dudeness, or, Duder, or, you know, el Duderino, if you're not into the whole brevity thing.

The Big Lebowski: I cannot solve your problems, sir, only you can.
The Dude: Oh, fuck it.
The Big Lebowski: Yes, that's your answer. That's your answer to everything. Tattoo it on your forehead. Your revolution is over, Mr. Lebowski! Condolences! The bums lost! My advice to you is to do what your parents did! Get a job, sir! The bums will always lose! Do you hear me, Lebowski?! The bums will always lose!

The Dude: You want me to blow on your, toes?
Bunny Lebowski: I can't blow that far.
The Dude: Are you sure he won't mind?
Bunny Lebowski: He really doesn't care about anything. He's a nihilist.
The Dude: Oh, and that must be exhausting.

The Dude: You can't do that, man. These guys, you know, they're like me. They're pacifists. Smokey was a conscientious objector.
Walter Sobchak: You know, Dude, I, myself, dabbled in pacifism at one point, not in 'nam, of course.
The Dude: And you know he's got emotional problems, man.
Walter Sobchak: You mean, beyond pacifism?

The Dude: Just take it easy, man.
Walter Sobchak: You know, that's your answer for everything, Dude. And let me point out something. Pacifism is not look at our current situation with that camelfucker in Iraq. Pacifism is not something to hide behind.
The Dude: Just take it easy, man.
Walter Sobchak: I'm perfectly calm, Dude.
The Dude: Yeah, waving the fucking gun around?
Walter Sobchak: Calmer than you are.
The Dude: Will you just take it easy?
Walter Sobchak: Calmer than you are.

The Big Lebowski: What makes a man, Mr. Lebowski?
The Dude: I... don't know, sir.
The Big Lebowski: Is it being prepared to do the right thing? Whatever the cost? Isn't that what makes a man?
The Dude: Sure, that and a pair of testicles.

Walter Sobchak: It's all goddamn fake, man. It's like Lenin said. You look for the person who will benefit, and, you know...
Donny: I am the walrus?
Walter Sobchak: You know, you'll ... You know what I'm trying to say.
Donny: I am the walrus.
Walter Sobchak: That fuckin' bitch!
Donny: I am the walrus.
Walter Sobchak: Shut the fuck up, Donny! V.I. Lenin. Vladimir Ilyich Ulyanov!

Jesus Quintana: Let me tell you something, pendejo, you pull any crazy shit with us, you flash a piece out on the lanes, I'll take it away from you and stick it up your ass and pull the fuckin' trigger till it goes click.
The Dude: Jesus.
Jesus Quintana: You said it, man. Nobody fucks with the Jesus.

The Dude: Yeah. That's a great plan. Walter, that's fucking ingenious, if I understand it correctly. It's a Swiss fuckin' watch.
Walter Sobchak: That's right, Dude. The beauty of this is its simplicity. Once a plan gets too complex, everything can go wrong. If there's one thing I learned in 'nam, it's--

Walter Sobchak: Aw, fuck it, Dude. Let's go bowling.

Maude Lebowski: Does the female form make you uncomfortable, Mr. Lebowski?
The Dude: Is that what this is a picture of?
Maude Lebowski: In a sense, yes. My art has been commended as being strongly vaginal, which bothers some men. The word itself makes some men uncomfortable. Vagina.
The Dude: Oh, yeah?
Maude Lebowski: Yes, they don't like hearing it and find it difficult to say, whereas without batting an eye, a man will refer to his dick or his rod Or his... Johnson.
The Dude: Johnson?

Maude Lebowski: So Oolie has the money?
The Dude: Well... no, not exactly. This is a very complicated case, Maude. A lot of ins, a lot of outs, a lot of what-have-yous, and... a lot of strands to keep in my head, man. A lot of strands in old Duder's head.

The Dude: You know, Walter, you're right. There is an unspoken message here. It's fuck you! Leave me the fuck alone!... Yeah, I'll be at practice.

The Stranger: All The Dude ever wanted was his rug back. I'm not greedy. It would really... tie the room together.

Walter Sobchak: I can't drive, Dude, It's Erev Shabbos.
The Dude: What?
Walter Sobchak: Erev Shabbos. I can't drive.
The Dude: Man!
Walter Sobchak: I'm not even supposed to pick up the phone unless it's an emergency.
The Dude: This is a fucking emergency!
Walter Sobchak: I understand. That's why I picked up the phone.

Walter Sobchak: My point is, here we are, it's Shabbos, the Sabbath, which I'm allowed to break only if it's a matter of life or death.
The Dude: Will you come off it, Walter? You're not even fucking Jewish, man.
Walter Sobchak: What the fuck are you talking about?
The Dude: You're fucking Polish-catholic.
Walter Sobchak: What the fuck are you talking about? I converted when I married Cynthia. Come on, Dude. You know this. The Dude: And 5 fucking years ago, you were divorced.
Walter Sobchak: So what are saying? When you get divorced, you turn in your library card? You get a new license? You stop being Jewish?

Walter Sobchak: Hey, fuck it, man. Let's go bowling.

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