Worldstar!

You're the Worst 4×9

Gretchen: I'm not really a "do something about stuff" kind of person. I'm more of a "it's too late to buy a wedding gift, so I'll just stop being friends with them" kind of person.

Edgar: Dude, are you sure Birds is for kids? That's the second suicide and they haven't even left the island yet!

Jimmy: Well, I have some highly exciting news! The Width of a Peach is a bestseller! It is number seven on Amazon's Erotica list, number five on Amazon's Erotica subcategory Historical Romance list, and number one on Amazon's Erotica subcategory Historical Romance subcategories, World War II, UK and Family Fun.

Jimmy: ....And then, we fell asleep on the phone together. Like lovers.

Becca: Hey! I had her, you watch her. That was the deal.

Faye: Girls, you don't have to compete for my attention. I'm never gonna tell you which one I like better.

Jimmy: Happiness is a finite commodity. You have to steal it from people.

Becca: Sorry, peaches. You can try and blame other people, but, like the actual 9/11, you did it to yourself.

Faye Cottumaccio: Well, Officer, if you're gonna search the place, I suggest you start under my sweater—
Faye: Am I talking?

Gretchen: Have you guys noticed a pattern?
Lindsay: It was the '80s, Gretch. You put some triangles and squiggly lines on a shirt and called it fashion.

Lindsay: The only way our lives are going to get fixed is if we fix them ourselves.

Gretchen: Seriously, what is wrong with me?

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