From the Beginning, I Was Screwed

You're the Worst 4×11

Boone: Speaker phone! Child in the kitchen!

Gretchen: If you guys did a song together, it would be massive. I don't want to just throw out the phrase, "Plays over the Grey's Anatomy credits," but, yeah, that.

Steeb Corniglia: Ooh, I adore Jimmy. Between you and me, it felt like a cacodoxy to be sidetracked by a genre experiment. Concur?

Gretchen: Poland? Nice choice. What, was Kyrgyzstan already taken?
Olivia: Poland is the ninth largest country in Europe. They boast 17 Nobel Prize winners, and their main foods are pierogies, kielbasa and golumpkies.
Gretchen: What? "Blumpkins"? Spoiler alert, this bitch is toast.

Edgar: From the beginning, I was screwed. My mom's uterus was L-shaped. That's why I have equilibrium problems.

Gretchen: Everyone knows that France is the best country. They basically won World War II, and they invented the best type of kissing: tongue kissing. Their president is a Benetton model who bangs his mom-wife.

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Gretchen: Are you kidding me? I-I'm not even done yet. I have a whole thing with a baguette!

Lindsay: What are we watching? I know a bunch of the sounds they're saying, but I don't understand the sentences.

Edgar: We still have to write our sketch for this week. What if there's a dictator who's a tater, but also a total dick?

Paul: Lindsay... it wasn't my fault. The entire DUI industry is run by a for-profit organization called Mothers Against Drunk Driving. They keep lowering the legal limit so they can raise money to pay their huge executive salaries. That's mothers for you.

Doug Benson: Quick call before I board a flight to Davos. I'm hosting a forum on building investor confidence in post-civil war Moldova.
Edgar: Wait. There's a civil war in Moldova?!
Doug Benson: Not yet, but we're aiming for March.

Doug Benson: Okay, got to run. Deep state never sleeps.

Gretchen: Uh, what he's having, but a triple.
Bartender: He's having a triple.
Gretchen: Right. So make mine... nine.

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