The Military Miniaturization

The Big Bang Theory 10×2

& Sheldon: Elon Musk has a theory that we’re all just characters in some advanced civilization’s video game.
    Leonard: So some alien kid spent his money on the asthma-and-glasses upgrade for me?
    Sheldon: Well, he doesn’t say it’s a good game.

& Howard: I was counting on that money— I need to make as much as my wife so I don’t have to try so hard in bed.

& Leonard: Are you crazy? You can’t put that on Snapchat.
    Raj: Fine, I’ll put it on Facebook like a caveman.

& Penny: God, I feel so bad— I just lied to her.
    Amy: Oh, but you did it so well. That’s amazing! It’s like watching a sculptor, but your clay was lies.

& Amy: Seriously, you have got to let me scan your brain when you’re being dishonest so I can see what lights up.

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& Sheldon: This must be how you practice law in Boca Raton, by saying things you don’t mean and meaning things you don’t say.

& Bernadette: I’ve been trying to figure out a way to get back at her... Do you think using her work computer to Google «how to be a prostitute» is over the line?

& Howard: You have a good grasp of the physics.
    Colonel Williams: Well, I’m a scientist by training.
    Leonard: Really? You’re a physicist?
    Colonel Williams: Better. I’m an engineer.

& Leonard: Thanks, but you should know we’re a little concerned about this being used in weapons.
    Colonel Williams: Oh, well, let me put your mind at ease... What we use it for is none of your business.

& Colonel Williams: Look, guys, it’s just a guidance system. It’s not like you’re handing us the Death Star from Star Trek.

& Penny: Are they gonna let you run it?
    Bernadette: Well, my boss said he hadn’t decided yet, so I gently reminded him that he’s an old rich white guy, and I’m a sweet little pregnant lady who’s not afraid to cry in front of a jury.

& Bernadette: Hey, I learned a long time ago, when you’re four feet eleven and eye level with every guy’s crotch, that’s where you punch.
    Penny: That’s funny. I learned something totally different...

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+ quotes on the IMDb

+ Vanity Card # 536