Lady Parts

Lucifer 2×4

& Lucifer: S-H-A-G. «Shag.» Oh, eight points to me and suck it, Maze!

& Dr. Linda: Sometimes, when we’re in crisis, we create distractions for ourselves, also known as barriers to facing our deepest fears.

& Dr. Linda: Has the visit with your mom been hard?
    Lucifer: Piece of cake, actually. Mum’s all sorted, not a problem. ...turns out Mum’s a peach.

& Lucifer: You need a distraction from your woes, Detective. It’s a highly effective tool.

& Lucifer: No, seriously, name three friends you could call right now for a drink. And you can’t say me, your child or the man you’re divorcing.

& Lucifer: Password’s «Carnal,» capital «C.»

& Lucifer: Let’s solve a murder.
    Phone: ’I can assist you with that.’
    Lucifer: It’s brilliant.

& Charlotte: ...children. Factories of filth. Of mire.

& Mazikeen: And how’s that human husband?
    Charlotte: I discovered a trick with him. Whenever he asks a question, I just have sex with him. Seems to render him mute.

& Charlotte: ...As for the rest of it, for lack of a better word, it is absolute... hell.

---

& Charlotte: Yes, these humans are awful. They breathe through their mouths, and they won’t... shut up about something called gluten.

& Chloe: Look, I get it. I know your mom’s in town. We’re both going through some stuff. If you need to talk, I’m here, okay?

& Dr. Linda: Are you okay? ... One exhalation yes, two... none of my business?

& Lucifer: Oh, gosh, I detest cats. Want an animal to stare at you with contempt? Get a cat. Open box of excrement in your house? Cat. Oh, gosh. Can you smell that? Foul, incontinent creatures.

& Mazikeen: If you want to retrace the steps of two hot girls on a girls’ night, you need to think like two hot girls on a girls’ night.
    Lucifer: With your lady parts.
    Mazikeen: And piña coladas in hand.
    Ella: Oh, my God, I love piña coladas!

& Dr. Linda: I’ll start. Um... I worked my way through med school as a phone sex operator... 1-800-ProfessorFeelGood.
    Ella: I would totally call that. I’m Ella, by the way. ... Um, okay. I’ll go next, I guess. Um... I used to steal cars. Who’s next?
    Mazikeen: I was forged in the bowels of Hell to torture the guilty for all of eternity.
    Dr. Linda: Interesting share.

& Lucifer: There are only two reasons to drink alone, brother. Either you’re a chronic dullard, or you’re trying to avoid your problems. If it’s the latter, I approve.

& Lucifer: My first startup was a sex club, actually. Little place called «Eden». Perhaps you’ve heard of it?

& Lucifer: Oh, phones... They can be so distracting.

& Chloe: There’s... a special place... in Hell... for women... who fake friendships as a way... of manipulating other women!
    Lucifer: She’s right, you know.

& Mazikeen: Look... I’ve got money. I like your kid, and you dress like crap, so I won’t be stealing any of your clothes.

& Lucifer: One silly human soul?

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