One Watson, One Holmes

Elementary 3×19

& Holmes: You cannot chew gum in my home.
    Chest Wound: Seriously?
    Holmes: Do I look like I’m joking?

& Chest Wound: On one side, you’ve got a group pretty much led by me. We like Everyone the way it is. We’re pranksters. We don’t have an ideology. We help the people we want to help, hurt the people we want to hurt, on, like, a case-by-case basis. The other side follows this guy «Species.» They want us to become a straight-up political movement. That means establishing parameters, aligning with the left, going against the right...

& Holmes: How are you?
    Watson: How am I?
    Holmes: Well, I-I thought perhaps that, uh, silence was awkward, so I was attempting to fill it. ... Typically, you’re the one who lubricates these moments with conversation, so...
    Watson: Well, I’m good if you are.

& Holmes: You know, there are several principal lines of inquiry when it comes to determining the motive for a murder. There’s cherchez la femme— look to the woman. ...
    Petros: Rule 57 of the Internet: you will never have sex. I’m the exception. Pretty sure Species wasn’t getting any. Like, ever.
    Holmes: Another line of inquiry is cui bono. Who benefits, hmm? A.K.A. follow the money.

---

& Watson: Is that a rainbow coming out of that unicorn’s butt?
    Holmes: Yeah. That is the online profile picture of Pony Pyew Pyew, member of Everyone’s Inner Sanctum... and one of the finest hackers in the world.

& Watson: There must be thousands of pages here.
    Holmes: 26 boxes, approximately 4,000 sheets a box— that’s roughly 104,000 sheets. The search will be exceedingly tedious; but one must, from time to time, outwork criminals as well as outthink them.

& Holmes: Your behavior has been troublingly incongruous of late.

& Holmes: That doesn’t work for me... Our relationship is predicated on one Holmes and one Watson. It’s a delicate homeostasis, and it doesn’t function properly if there are two Holmeses and no Watsons.

& Watson: What are you doing?
    Holmes: I’m tapping «Wake up, Watson» in Morse code.

& Capt. Gregson: Look, you bring me solid evidence, establish probable cause, I’ll put cuffs on God himself. But until then, there’s nothing I can do.

& Watson: I thought it would be good for me to connect with my fellow humans.
    Holmes: Well, enjoy yourself, Watson.
    Watson: I’ll try. Holmes.

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