Alan Harper, Pleasing Women Since 2003

Two and a Half Men 11×5

& Jenny: Morning.
    Walden: Afternoon.
    Jenny: Oh, thank God. I thought I was drinking in the morning.

& Alan: You know, when life gives you lemons, you take lemon’s clothes and have sex with his girlfriend.

& Walden: You have a second?
    Jenny: I just finished my second. What I need is a third.
    Walden: I will fill your cup but I will fill it with knowledge, potential and opportunity.
    Jenny: But bourbon makes me feel smarter, prettier and taller.

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& Alan: I’ve been told my kisses are like French fries. Can’t stop with just one.

& Jenny: I went to the first class, but it was lame.
    Walden: It doesn’t mean that you’re not gonna learn something from it. Do you think that I just said, «Oh, I have a software idea and I’m gonna sell it for a billion dollars the next day?»
    Jenny: I Googled you. That is what happened.

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