Eagleheart 1x1

Get Worse Soon

Season 1, Episode 1

& Vargas: Xavier, when you get up to 5,000 feet, chuck her out. I want to hear you go splat, little lady.
    Chris Monsanto: Sorry about that, Vargas, but you can’t board a plane with more than two bags... Scumbags, that is.
    Vargas: Marshal Chris Monsanto... Who’s the new partner?
Monsanto: The name’s Trace Domino.
    Vargas: Wow. Maybe this one will survive.

& Vargas: Let’s dance.
    Monsanto: I’ll lead.

& Chief: Chris, I’d hoped you’d never have to use that level again.
    Monsanto: Yeah, well, chief, after today I won’t have to. I’m done with having a partner.
    Chief: That’s why we’re giving you two partners. I’d like you to meet Brett Mobley and Susie Wagner.

& Monsanto: Trace was a great marshal...
    Brett: I’m sorry about your partner, man. That blows. I once had a sandwich that I loved that I dropped on the ground.

& Monsanto: Vargas? Vargas is dead.
    Chief: Um... That’s the other thing I wanted to talk to you about. He’s not “dead dead.” He’s in critical condition at city hospital.

---

& Monsanto: Excuse me. Um, have you seen this autopsy report? It says you were strangled to death... But, of course, these reports can often be wrong. Time of death — now.

& Monsanto: Good news, bullets. It’s moving day. You’ll be living in Vargas from now on. Call me at Thanksgiving.

& Vargas: Hey, Chris, will you tell me a bedtime story?
    Monsanto: Well, all right. Uh... Let’s see. Once upon a time, there was a little bunny rabbit named Chris...
    Vargas: Like you?
    Monsanto: Yes, Vargas. Very much like me. ... And what this little rabbit wanted, more than anything else, was to kill the evil turtle who had murdered all his buddies. But the evil turtle’s shell was too soft, and Chris knew it wouldn’t be right to kill him. So bunny Chris worked very hard to make the evil turtle’s shell normal again so that he could stick a gun in his mouth and blow his brains all over the forest floor.
    Vargas: So did he make him normal again?
    Monsanto: We’ll see, little turtle. We shall see.


On Imdb.

__ Strange at least.