The Occupation Recalibration

The Big Bang Theory 7×13

& Leonard: Look, if you want to break up, just say it!
    Penny: Leonard...
    Leonard: No, no, no, no! I take it back. Don’t say it. Just-just hate me, but stay with me. It worked for my parents.

& Penny: Listen, I don’t want to break up with you.
    Leonard: Oh. O-Okay. Good, good. So, it’s cool if I cry a little?

& Stuart: Wow. What happened?
    Bernadette: Batman got his ass kicked by my curling iron.

& Howard: You know, if you’d rather skip lunch and hang out with your boyfriend Bert, it’s totally okay.
    Amy: He’s not my boyfriend.
    Raj: Are you sure? He’s tall, pale and awkward. That sounds like your type.
    Amy: Should someone as lonely as you really be making fun of me?
    Raj: Yeah, grow up, Howard! God...

& Howard: Does he know you’re dating Sheldon?
    Amy: I guess it hasn’t come up.
    Howard: There you go.
    Raj: And does Sheldon know you’re dating Sheldon?..
    Amy: I’m sorry. Who are you dating?
    Raj: Yeah, knock it off, Howard!

& Penny: You okay?
    Sheldon: I’m on vacation. What do you think?

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& Penny: Why can’t Leonard understand it?
    Sheldon: Because he’s not like us, Penny... We’re dreamers.

& Howard: The mineral and rock show? That would be awful even without Bert.
    Amy: So what am I supposed to do now?
    Raj: Prepare your uterus for his gigantic offspring?

& Raj: She wrote “no way” on both our cappuccinos.

& Amy: Well, how would you want a girl to tell you she wasn’t interested?
    Raj: I guess, uh, I’d like her to sit me down, look me in the eye and say... “I was wrong. I love you.” And then maybe she could touch me in a special way...
    Howard: That’s how you reject a guy!

& Leonard: How did she get you to do yoga?
    Sheldon: Well, to be honest, I thought she said “Yoda.”

& Leonard: Maybe we need to talk about the kind of relationship we’re actually in.
    Penny: Yeah, well, maybe we do.
    Sheldon: I’m willing to if you guys are.
    Leonard: Can we please have some privacy?
    Sheldon: Y... No. I’m as much a part of this relationship as you two, and I think it’s high time we put all our cards on the table. Yeah. For example, where is this going? Are you two ever getting married? And, if so, where will we all live? Have you thought about that?

& Penny: Okay, wait. What are we doing?
    Leonard: For some reason, we’re planning a future where we both live with Sheldon forever.
    Sheldon: Good! Now we’re getting somewhere.

& Bert: Thanks for coming to the mineral and rock show with me.
    Raj: We’re sorry Amy didn’t want to go.
    Howard: Really, really sorry.
    Bert: Who needs her when I have you guys?.. Rock show! Rock show! Rock shoooooow!

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On the IMDb