Mafia

The Office 6×6

Michael Scott: The fundamentals of business. The fundamentals of business. "Mental" is a part of the word. I have underlined it. Because you're mental if you don't have a good time. You have to enjoy it.
Toby Flenderson: "Fun" is in it. "Fun"-damental.
Michael Scott: Oh, right. Get out.

Michael Scott: What you people don't know about business, I could fill a book with.
Ryan Howard: Then do it.
Michael Scott: What?
Ryan Howard: Write a book!

Michael Scott: The Fundamentals of Business by Michael Scott. Over one billion sold. More than the Bible. I'm not surprised. Chapter One. The businessman...

Michael Scott: There's nothing more insulting to a great salesman than having to listen to a bad salesman... It's like a great basketball player having to listen to a bad basketball player.

Oscar Martinez: Pam and Jim are on their honeymoon, so there's not the usual balance between sane and others. Toby has mentally checked out since June. It's a very dangerous time. The coalition for reason is extremely weak.

Dwight Schrute: Criminals are like raccoons, okay? You give them a taste of cat food, pretty soon they'll be back for the whole cat.

Dwight Schrute: The only way to defeat a bully is to stand up to him. Trust me, I have bullied a lot of people.

Kevin Malone: I wouldn't last in jail, Oscar. I'm not like you.
Oscar Martinez: What's that supposed to mean?
Kevin Malone: What, you don't know about jail? You would love jail.
Oscar Martinez: Why would I love jail?
Kevin Malone: Because... You would love it.

Dwight Schrute: I don't understand. Why would you buy a policy?
Michael Scott: It's just the cost of a cup of coffee an hour.

Michael Scott: If there is one thing I hate more than the Mafia, it is a liar. I wish the Mafia would go out and kill all the liars. And bury them in my yard. And I wouldn't tell the cops a thing. Not that I would be lying, per se, but I would just get really quiet all of a sudden.

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+ Quotes on the IMDb