Do You Believe in Magic

Modern Family 8×12

& Jay: Crap. Crap. Crappacino. Charlie Craplin.
    Gloria: In Colombia, when the old man starts yelling at the mail, we put them on a sandbar and wait for the tide to come in.

& Jay: Oh, my God. Is it still talking?
    Gloria: Jay, that’s so rude!
    Jay: He overthinks everything. If you have a shot at the bad girl, jump.

---

& Sal: That cold water woke me up to the hard truth... I’m smart, I’m beautiful, I’m legendary in bed—
    Cameron: Okay.
    Sal: ...yet I do settle. I mean, Werner is not good enough for me. I mean, I get why you two idiots settled. This is the best you’re gonna do, right here. You’re perfectly matched—
    Mitchell: Aww.
    Cameron: Well, it’s kind of sweet when you look at it that way.
    Mitchell: Yeah. We are very lucky.
    Cameron: Happy Valentine’s Day.
    Sal: Shut up. Read a room, poofs.

& Jay: And no more giving underwear to little girls, or anyone else, ’cause it’s creepy and European.

--
On the IMDb