The Hamburger Postulate
Season 1, Episode 5
* Penny: Leonard, I didn't know you played the cello.
Leonard: Yeah, my parents felt that naming me Leonard and putting me in advanced-placement classes wasn't getting me beaten up enough.
* Leonard: What did Penny mean, "you'd make a cute couple"?
Sheldon: I assume she meant the two of you... would constitute a couple that others might consider cute.
An alternate and less likely interpretation is that you could manufacture one.
* Leonard: If Penny didn't know that Leslie had turned me down... then that would mean that she, Penny, thought I should ask her, Leslie, out... indicating that Penny had no interest in me asking her out.
But because she did know I had asked Leslie out... and that she, Leslie, had turned me down... then she, Penny, could be offering consolation. "That's too bad, you would have made a cute couple."
Sheldon: You're a lucky man, Leonard.
Leonard: How so?
Sheldon: You're talking to one of the three men in the West capable of following that train of thought.
Leonard: Well, what do you think?
Sheldon: I said I could follow it, I didn't say I cared.
* Leslie: Just so we're clear, you understand me hanging back to practice with you is a pretext for letting you know that I'm sexually available.
Leonard: Really?
Leslie: Yeah, I'm good to go.
Leonard: I thought you weren't interested in me.
Leslie: That was before I saw you handling that beautiful piece of wood between your legs.
Leonard: You mean my cello.
Leslie: No, I mean the obvious, crude double entendre.
* Sheldon: Just come with me. ... Well?
Penny: Well, what?
Sheldon: What does it mean?
Penny: Come on, you went to college.
Sheldon: Yes, but I was 11.
Penny: A tie on the doorknob usually means someone doesn't wanna be disturbed because they're, you know, getting busy.
Sheldon: So you're saying Leonard has a girl in there?
Penny: Well, either that or he's lost his tie rack and gotten really into Bryan Adams.
Leslie: Oh, Leonard, you magnificent beast.
* Leslie: What are you doing?
Leonard: Just extending the intimacy. Hey, do you wanna slip over to the radiation lab... and share a decontamination shower?
Leslie: Okay, what exactly do you think's going on between us?
Leonard: I'm not sure, but I think I'm about to discover how the banana felt.
Leslie: Neither of us are neuroscientists, but we both understand the biochemistry of sex. Dopamine in our brains is released across synapses, causing pleasure. Stick electrodes in a rat's brain, give him an orgasm button. He'll push that thing until he starves to death.
Leonard: Well, who wouldn't? Heh.
Leslie: The difference between us and the rat is you can't stick an electrode in our hypothalamus. That's where you come in.
Leonard: Yeah, well, I'm just glad to be a part of it. Heh. So, what happens now?
Leslie: Well, I don't know about your sex drive, but I'm probably good till New Year's.
Leonard: Oh. Okay. Thank you.
Leslie: Thank you.
Leonard: You wanna make plans for New Year's?
Leslie: Please, you're smothering me.
--- Словарик:
cello — виолончель
consolation — утешение
smother — душить; затруднять дыхание
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