The Long Distance Dissonance

The Big Bang Theory 10×24

& Amy: In fact, that’s when I started to really miss you.
    Sheldon: ... You know you just split an infinitive.
    Amy: Did I? Are you gonna teach me a lesson?
    Sheldon: I am. It is naughty to put an adverb between the word «to» and the verb stem.
    Amy: What are you gonna do about it?
    Sheldon: I’m going to admonish you.
    Amy: Vigorously?
    Sheldon: That’s the only kind of admonishing I do.

& Howard: Okay, the simplest explanation is usually the right one...
    Raj: Which is?
    Howard: That ain’t Sheldon.

& Sheldon: I think you’d like her. She’s extremely intelligent, just like you. Unlike you, she’s tall, blonde and used to be an Olympic swimmer.

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& Penny: Come on, it’s Sheldon. Nothing is gonna happen.
    Amy: That’s what you said to me when I started dating him! And then five years later, bingo-bango, something happened!!

& Amy: You don’t get it. I’ve been smacking that ketchup bottle for a long time. All she’s got to do is tip it over and point it at her fries.

& Leonard: You think you should call Amy?
    Penny: You got fingers and a mouth, you call her!

& Penny: All right, this is making me crazy. Somebody’s got to go over there!
    Leonard: You got feet and legs, you do it.

& Raj: There’s no way a woman that attractive is trying to seduce Sheldon Cooper...
    Howard: You done trying to make yourself feel better?
    Raj: No. I haven’t played the race card yet.

& Sheldon: That was fun. It was like Mario Kart.

& Sheldon: Question: are you seeking a romantic relationship with me?

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