Sympathy for the Goddess

Lucifer 2×17

& Amenadiel: I think you might be in danger.
    Lucifer: Is it the Yakuza? The Nephilim? One Million Mums?

& Mazikeen: It is Lucifer’s fault. It’s always Lucifer’s fault.

& Ella: But the home screen is... two eyes?
    Charlotte: Human female breasts.
    Lucifer: No. That is a woman’s perfectly freckled rump.
    Chloe: So... our lead on the killer... is a pair of butt-boob-eyes. It’s a great start.

& Dan: I don’t understand you. All right, whatever this is between us.
    Charlotte: Well, it’s simple, Daniel Espinoza... I like you.

& Mazikeen: Like this guy. Lucifer Morningstar... The worst patient anyone could ask for. He is a back-stabbing, selfish, narcissistic little devil!

& Bianca: How are the children?
    Charlotte: They’re angels!

& Amenadiel: Well, if there is one constant in the universe, it’s that Lucifer’s the favorite. No matter what I do. No matter how hard I work or how much he screws up.

& Mazikeen: You don’t care about anyone other than yourself. Unless they can be of use to you. Sound familiar?
    Lucifer: Tread very carefully, Maze!
    Mazikeen: You’re just like your parents!

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& Linda: Since I’m not currently a practicing doctor of psychiatry, I don’t have to lead you on this path of realization; I can just tell you.

& Ella: ... Birthday reverse... Nope. Double 69... Oddly relieved that’s not it.

& Chloe: Lucifer, she told me who she really is, and how you two are related.
    Lucifer: I somehow doubt that.
    Chloe: No, it all makes sense. Why you were so disgusted when I suggested you two had slept together. Why you act so weird around her in general...
    Lucifer: She... really told you.

& Charlotte: A book? That’s what Zeke smuggled for me? Is this a joke?
    Lucifer: Well, if it were, I would have chosen something funnier, like Douglas Adams or Freud.

& Amenadiel: There’s something going on with her...
    Lucifer: Yeah. Or it’s just that time of the millennium.

& Dan: She... step-mom? That makes a weird amount of sense, actually.

& Chloe: If you married her, you’d kind of be like Lucifer’s dad.

& Lucifer: Look down. Is that the key around your neck or are you just happy to see me?

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