Bubbikins

The Crown 3×4

Queen Elizabeth II: And your own position?
Harold Wilson: Mine, ma'am?
Queen Elizabeth II: Yes, Prime Minister, yours. You hold the casting vote.
Harold Wilson: Well, I've always been an ardent supporter of the monarchy, as the record shows. But when it comes to a plea of poverty from the husband of the richest woman in the world and an appeal to the British taxpayer for a pay rise at a time like this, even I find myself... conflicted.

Greek Cop: There's nothing fake about her, you idiot. She's a real nun. And a real princess... Princess Alice of Greece and Denmark was born in Windsor Castle. Her great-uncle was the Tsar of Russia, her great-grandmother was Queen Victoria, and her son is married to the Queen of England.

Servant: His Royal Highness the Duke of...
Queen Elizabeth II: Not me, I'm afraid. I'm "darling" or "cabbage." "Sweetie" is someone else.

Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh: I know you value your privacy, but I think there's a lot about you that they would like if they... if they got a chance. The fact that, generally, you're good value for money.
Princess Anne: Like a pair of long-lasting boots?
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh: Is there anything one loves more in life than a pair of long-lasting boots?

Queen Elizabeth II: I'm afraid my husband is quite taken by the idea of this documentary. And while I might not understand television, I do understand marriage, and when it is important to let someone shine.

Lord Snowdon: It's a... it's a documentary film... It means, um... no acting. No artifice. Just the real thing. Like one of those wildlife films.
Queen Elizabeth the Queen Mother: Oh, I like those.
Princess Margaret: Yes, except this time, we are the endangered species.
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh: Yes, exactly. It will follow all of us in our daily lives to prove to everyone out there what we in here already know.
Queen Elizabeth II: What's that?
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh: Well, how hard we all work. And what good value we represent. How much we deserve the taxpayers' money.

Princess Margaret: We are being filmed watching television. That people might watch us watching television on their own television sets at home. This really is plumbing new depths of banality.

Princess Margaret: This is nothing like a normal evening. If it was a normal evening, we'd all be on our own in sad isolation in individual palaces. It wouldn't be crowded like this. This is like some kind of nightmare Christmas.

Harold Wilson: I like to think I understand television as well as anyone in the country. I owe my political life to it. And that's because I've learned, over time, how to do it. How to make it work for me.
Queen Elizabeth II: Perhaps the royal family is not best suited to it.
Harold Wilson: Television is good for normal people.
Queen Elizabeth II: But that was the whole point. To show everyone that behind palace gates, we are perfectly normal people.
Harold Wilson: No, ma'am, you're not normal.
Queen Elizabeth II: Aren't we? We wake up in the morning, go to bed at night. We work, get tired, get colds. We have uncles that embarrass us, Christmases to endure. We are perfectly normal.
Harold Wilson: But people don't consider you to be and... if I may say, and this is where it gets a little complicated... they don't want you to be normal.
Queen Elizabeth II: Well, what do they want? Tell me. It's all any of us want to know. What do you want from us?
Harold Wilson: Well, the truth is, we don't know what we want. Other than we want you to be ideal.
Queen Elizabeth II: An ideal... No human being is ideal. Only God is ideal. Which is why I'd favor the royal family being kept out of sight, out of mind, for our own survival and sanity. But the thing is we can't be hidden away. We have to be in full view all the time.
Harold Wilson: So, what's the answer?
Queen Elizabeth II: The best we've come up with so far is ritual and mystery. Because it keeps us hidden while still in plain sight. The smoke and the mirrors, the mystery and the protocol, it's not there to keep us apart. It is there to keep us alive.

Princess Alice: Now, Bubbikins, you mentioned faithlessness. How is your faith?
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh: Dormant.
Princess Alice: What?
Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh: Dormant.
Princess Alice: That's not good. Let this be a mother's gift... to her child. The one piece of advice... Find yourself a faith. It helps. No... Not just helps. It's everything.

Michael Adeane: There is one more thing, ma'am. The royal family documentary has had a great deal of interest from overseas broadcasters. The Canadian Broadcasting Corporation, the Australian Broadcasting Corporation, CBS in the United States...
Queen Elizabeth II: No.
Michael Adeane: Ma'am?
Queen Elizabeth II: I don't think so.
Michael Adeane: Right. I gather the BBC plans to repeat it in three weeks' time.
Queen Elizabeth II: I don't think that either. As a matter of fact, I think it best if that documentary were never seen again, anywhere, by anyone. Can I leave that with you?
Michael Adeane: Yes, ma'am.

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