Weight Loss

The Office 5×1

Andy Bernard: I'm excited to lose weight for the wedding, because I really want to have washboard abs the first time Angela sees me naked.

Michael Scott: Ex-squeeze me. No, I will ex-squeeze you.

Oscar Martinez: ... Also, and no pressure, the teacher, he's a catch.
Holly Flax: Actually, I'm a lesbian.
Oscar Martinez: I'm gay.
Holly Flax: I'm not a lesbian. I don't know why I said that. Stupid joke.
Oscar Martinez: What's the joke?
Holly Flax: No, there is no joke. I just said it because I haven't had much luck lately and I'm not really looking to date, so maybe I should switch to women.
Oscar Martinez: You think it's a choice?
Holly Flax: I'm going to head back to my work area and just...
Oscar Martinez: I'm messing with you, Holly.
Holly Flax: I knew that.

Andy Bernard: This is The Breakers, Newport, Rhode Island. Huge, awesome, gorgeous mansion overlooking the Atlantic. And my dad went to Cornell with the current groundskeeper. Every little boy fantasizes about his fairytale wedding... This is where my parents decided not to get divorced.

Jim Halpert: I can't believe I'm saying this, but Michael is actually killing it with Holly. And I think I know why... It's because Holly is kind of a major dork.

Angela Martin: Listen, dummy, it's not that hard. All you have to do is take the numbers from the sales report and type them into a master spreadsheet. A GD monkey could do it. I do not understand why you can't do it!
Holly Flax: No! You do not talk to him like that!
Angela Martin: But he's an idiot!
Holly Flax: Hey. He is not an idiot.
Kevin Malone: Thank you, Holly.
Holly Flax: He is mentally challenged. But he's doing a super job here.

Andy Bernard: Hey, so, since my little lady has such particular, impossible-to-perceive taste, I've made non-refundable deposits at four totally different wedding locales. Hot air balloons over Napa Valley, world famous Walt Disney's Epcot Center, scuba diving wedding in the Bahamas and Wilkes-Barre Marriott Ballroom C.
Angela Martin: Dangerous, tacky, sharks, haunted. No.

Michael Scott: What is wrong with these people? They have no willpower. I went... I once went 28 years without having sex. And then again for seven years.

Andy Bernard: Sweetheart, just so you know, I don't care where we get married. I'll marry you right here in this building. I'll marry you in the parking lot. I'll marry you in the eye of a hurricane in the middle of a snow storm on top of a monsoon. All I care about is that we're going to spend the rest of our lives together.

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