The Bones of St Nicholas

Inside No. 9 (8×1)

Jasper: You must be Dick?
Dick: Oh, call me Dick. Everyone does.

Dick: Champing — camping in a church. That's what we call it. Though it does have unfortunate connotations of someone eating with their mouth full.

Jasper: I just want to spend a peaceful night here alone with my thoughts and memories.
Dick: Oh, I'm sure you won't be alone... Merry Christmas, Jasper. And God bless us, every one.

Pierce: Hey, watch this... Our lager which art in barrels, hallowed be thy ale. Thy kegdom come, I will be drunk, at home, as in the tavern. Give us this day our foamy head, and forgive us our spillages, as we forgive those who spill against us. Deliver us not into inebriation, for thine is the stout, the bitter, and the lager, forever and ever, barmen!

Jasper: It's St Nicholas. The original Santa Claus.
Posy: You mean the Coca Cola one?
Jasper: Uh, a little before that, I believe.

Dick: Well, I never!... Merry Christmas.

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