Branch Wars

The Office 4×6

Michael Scott: Look, this is very hard for me, but I am going to give you my best man... You may have Toby.

Michael Scott: You cannot take the hilarious black guy from the office... Stanley is part of what makes this branch so extraordinary. The bluesy wisdom, the sassy remarks, the crossword puzzles, the smile, those big, watery, red eyes... I don't know how George Bush did it when Colin Powell left.

Michael Scott: How can I get you to stay?
Stanley Hudson: Money.
Michael Scott: Yeah. We all want money. But there is none in the budget. So, tell me why you're really leaving.
Stanley Hudson: Money.
Michael Scott: Mo' money, mo' problems, Stanley. You of all people should know that. Let me ask you this, if I were...
Stanley Hudson: Money.

Michael Scott: I... I have no words.

Jim Halpert: So, the deal was Dwight doesn't blow anything up and I wear a costume. And a mustache.

Dwight Schrute: I have to do something to his eyes!.. The eyes are the groin of the head.

Michael Scott: We tried and we failed. Stanley, you may go. Here is a box for your things. But I doubt that that box will be able to contain all the memories that you have of this place. Fly away, sweet little bird. Fly away and be free.

Michael Scott: Pam. I'm going to need some help writing a want ad... Wanted. Middle-aged black man with sass. Big butt. Bigger heart. I can't do this!

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+ Quotes on the IMDb