Harry, a Parent

Resident Alien 2×13

Asta Twelvetrees: Do you have a time machine? Wait! Can we go back in time?
Harry Vanderspeigle: There is no such thing as a time machine. The only effective way to travel through time is through... is through... There is no word for it. Uh... In English, a portal, I guess, is the closest thing you could say.

Harry Vanderspeigle: I have to urinate.
D'Arcy Bloom: I need to urinate. Why do you sound like C-3PO? Just say you have to pee.
Harry Vanderspeigle: I have to pee-3PO.

Harry Vanderspeigle: Humans do not realize what crop circles really are... Alien emojis. The complex circle on the right stands for my middle finger.

Asta Twelvetrees: I found a bunch of stuff online about the Alpha Draconians.
Harry Vanderspeigle: Mm-hmm.
Asta Twelvetrees: They're a lizard people, so, what, we look for them under rocks or something? Also, are they poisonous like Komodo dragons?

Harry Vanderspeigle: As a doctor... smoke more.

Deputy Liv Baker: I know. It's safer to be a skeptic. But sometimes, don't you want to see the world as just a little bit magical?

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