Hoodwinked Too! Hood vs. Evil

& Nicky Flippers: My name is Nicky, and I run the Happily Ever After Agency, an organization dedicated to making happy endings for everyone. As we say in the HEA, “It’s not just a fairy tale, it’s an adventure.”

& The Big Bad Wolf: Looks like Red’s a no-show. Again.
    Nicky: Wolf, we talked about this. Red’s on assignment.
    Wolf: And I’m supposed to be at the DMV, but I showed up.

& Wolf: Nicky Flippers’ little superstar is far, far... far away. Far, far, far... far away. Far... far away.
    Twitchy: Yeah, yeah, I get it!
    Wolf: Just saying it’s quite a ways.

& Verushka the Witch: Comfypoo, Abigail?
    Granny Puckett: Have we met before? Was it the ’60s? The ’60s are kind of a blur.

& Jimmy 10-Strings: Maybe I could tell you something about Goldilocks. That is not her natural hair color.
    Wolf: Really?
    Twitchy: I knew it!

& Red Riding Hood: Never trust short people!

& The Giant: Boys, I seem to have landed on a singing goat.

---

& Gretel: We’re the kidnappers!
    Hansel: Ja! You’ve been hoodwinked!
    Gretel: Too! Ja, Hansel!
    Hansel: Ja, Gretel!
    Gretel: We’re evil! We’re... something else that rhymes with evil!

& The first little pig: Hey, Wolf! It’s the Three Little Pigs, man.
    The second little pig: Remember us?
    The third little pig: Yeah! We’re here to huff and puff and blow your house up!

& Twitchy: How did you make them so mad?
    Wolf: It’s a long story. I’ll tell you later.
    The first little pig: One wolf en fuego, coming up.

& Hansel: Who’s big and bad now, Wolfie?
    Wolf: Actually, I’m more of a lover than a fighter.

& Twitchy: What’s that smell?
    Wolf: Perhaps the children are nervous and need to release a little tension. That’s natural.
    Twitchy: Man, that is strong.
    Wolf: Wow. That actually smells like gingerbread. You kids feel dizzy? My tongue is getting all puffy and I see rainbows. Is that normal?

& Hansel: I feel the power! All powerful! I have the strength of a thousand small boys! You’ll have to be excusing. We have a world to dominate.
    Gretel: Ja, no time for the dilly-dally.

& Granny: Giant superpowered German kids... Did not see that coming.

& Wolf: I thought you said we’d be OK!
    Granny: I exaggerated!
    Wolf: My life just flashed before my eyes. It’s weird, flashback really does add ten pounds.

& Agent HEA: You have the right to remain silent. You have the right to a treadmill. If you do not have a treadmill, one will be provided for you. You have the right to broccoli.
    Hansel: Not broccoli!

+ quotes on the Imdb.

__ Nah.