Gay Witch Hunt

The Office 3×1

Michael Scott: That is the fun of this place. I call everybody faggy. Why would anyone find that offensive? Okay. I think Oscar would just like it if you used lame or something like that. That's what faggy means.
Toby Flenderson: No, not really.
Michael Scott: Oh.

Michael Scott: I would have never called him that if I knew. You don't call retarded people retards. It's bad taste. You call your friends retards when they're acting retarded. And I consider Oscar a friend.

Michael Scott: You know? I'm just... I... I can't even imagine the thing... Maybe we could go out for a beer sometime and you could tell me how you do that to another dude.

Michael Scott: There could be others. I need to know. I don't want to offend anybody else.
Dwight Schrute: You could assume everyone is and not say anything offensive.
Michael Scott: Yeah...

Toby Flenderson: Okay, Michael, are you aware that you outed Oscar today?
Michael Scott: What? What does that even...
Toby Flenderson: Coming out is a significant moment for a gay person. And they should be allowed to select the timing and manner of announcing it.
Michael Scott: Well, gay pride, right? Gay pride parade. It's not, like, gay shame festival.

Michael Scott: I think Angela might be gay. Could Oscar and Angela be having a gay affair?

Michael Scott: Nothing wrong with this stuff at all. This is fine. You know what? Gay porn, straight porn, it's all good. I don't particularly get into this but, you know what, I totally see the merit. And actually, it is quite beautiful.

Michael Scott: All right, everybody in the conference room!... I don't care if you are gay, or straight, or a lesbian or overweight, just get in here!

Michael Scott: Did you know that gay used to mean happy? When I was growing up, it meant lame. And now it means a man who makes love to other men. We're all homos, Homo sapiens.

Michael Scott: We are not in the playground anymore. There are new rules. We have to be mature, but we can't lose the spirit of childlike wonder.

Michael Scott: What is love anyway? Maybe it's supposed to break all the rules. Like me and Jan. Or Oscar and some guy. Life is short. When two people find each other, what should stand in their way?

Michael Scott: I'm glad if today spurred social change. That's part of my job as regional manager. But, you know what, even if it didn't, at least we put this matter to bed. That's what she said. Or he said.

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