Halloween

The Office 2×5

Michael Scott: It's the end of the month, and I was supposed to let somebody go by the end of the month. And somehow I'm supposed to put on a costume and smile.

Michael Scott: If you were getting fired, how would you wanna be told so that you could still be friends with the person firing you?

Jim Halpert: I'm the three-hole punch version of Jim, 'cause you can have me either way, plain white Jim or three-hole punch.

Dwight Schrute: Would I ever leave this company? Look, I'm all about loyalty. In fact, I feel like part of what I'm getting paid for here is my loyalty. But if there were somewhere else that valued that loyalty more highly, I'm going wherever they value loyalty the most.

Jim Halpert: Honestly, I don't think Michael has the slightest clue of who he's gonna fire. I think he keeps hoping that someone's gonna volunteer, or be run over by a bus before the deadline. But in the end, really, what's gonna happen is it's gonna be the first person to give him a dirty look in the hall. And therein lies the true essence of his charisma.

Michael Scott: Okay, well, I already picked you and you know that, so, unless I just go through with this, you're always gonna look at me as the guy who almost fired you.
Creed: No, no, no, no, no, no. I will forget so fast. You will be my savior. You're the guy who gave me my life back! Thank you! I knew you'd see it my way, Michael. God bless you.

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+ Quotes on the IMDb