The One with Five Steaks and an Eggplant

Friends 2×5

Ross: You ever figure out what that thing's for?
Chandler: No, see, I'm trying this screening thing. I figure if I always answer the phone, people will think I don't have a life.

Chandler: Having a phone has finally paid off!
Ross: Even though you do do a good Bob impression... I'm thinking when she sees you tomorrow... she's probably gonna realize, hey, you're not Bob.
Chandler: I am hoping that when Bob doesn't show up... she will seek comfort in the open arms of the wry stranger at the next table.
Ross: Oh, my God. You are pure evil.
Chandler: Okay, pure evil... horny and alone.

Chandler: Okay. While Ross is on the phone... everybody owes me 62 bucks for his birthday.
Phoebe: Um, is there any chance that you're rounding up from... you know, from like 20?

Monica: All of a sudden, Leon, the manager, calls me into his office. Turns out they fired the head lunch chef, and guess who got the job.
Joey: If it's not you, this is a horrible story.
Monica: Fortunately, it is me.

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