Get Him to the Greek (2/2)

Half I

& Aldous: This is calm. Twenty minutes ago, I was even more calm when I had my fingers in your asshole.


& Aaron: I am trying to look up a friend of mine who's staying at the hotel. I don't know what room he's in.
    Concierge: Okay. What's the last name?
    Aaron: It's spelled H...
    Concierge: Okay.
    Aaron: ...E-R-O-I-N. Can you find that guest for me?


& Sergio: Whenever I would hear Frank or Dean or Sammy sing, shit would just warm my heart! You know, it just makes me fucking tingle*! It's nice, isn't it?
    Aldous: Yeah, I feel that. I feel that, Sergio. Sometimes I think that I was Frank Sinatra in a past life, even though I was born before he died.


& Sergio: Destiny, pay attention. You are gonna go and have sex with Aaron. Right now.
    Aaron: That's disrespectful.
    Sergio: Aaron, go with your destiny.
    Destiny: That's my name, Destiny. And you're using it two ways.


& Aaron: Okay, what are you doing? What? Don't do that.
    Destiny: I feel like I want to show you something.
    Aaron: I feel like I don't want to see it, though.


& Sergio: You can't outrun me! I'm black!

---

& Aaron: I'm gonna get on my hands and knees, and I'm gonna beg Daphne to take me back.
    Aldous: It's gonna be shameful.
    Aaron: But that's what you should do. Because Jackie is your Daphne!
    Aldous: I think it's a bit more complicated than that, mate.
    Aaron: No. Underneath that hair is a brain and a heart just like mine.
    Aldous: No, I think your brain is full of lollipops and rainbows and cheese and wonder. Mine's slightly darker.


& Jackie Q: I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I'm so glad we finally got to have this conversation, darling. Namaste.
    Aldous: This is not an appropriate time to say namaste.


& Aaron: You were right. We broke off our relationship without really thinking about it. And I've learned over the past few days that life is mainly filled with superficial surface encounters. And I realize now how wonderful it is, what we have. I'm begging you to take me back. I'm sorry.
    Daphne: Did you hook up with anyone while you were gone?
    Aaron: You mean surface encounters?


& Daphne: You had your turn. It's my turn now. I would like to have a threesome, please.
    Aldous: Don't think of it as a threesome. Think of it as having sex with your girlfriend while someone else also has sex with your girlfriend.
    Daphne: I think it'd be fun. We should do a threesome.
    Aaron: What are you doing?!
    Daphne: We are pre-negotiating a threesome.
    Aldous: Pre-negotiated. And agreed upon.
    Daphne: I'm fucking psyched!
    Aldous: So, Aaron, Daphne, shall we play doctor?
    Aaron: I'm not sucking his dick, that's like 100%!
    Aldous: Just relax. Just relax and listen to Mariah.


& Aaron: Nothing you say makes any sense! Okay? I understand that now. You're just a fucking junkie. And you're smart, so you make your insanity sound good, but it's bullshit.
    Aldous: This is it, Aaron. This is rock and roll. Did you enjoy the party?


& Aaron: You try so hard, man. But you're fine. You're Aldous Snow, man. You make people happy by doing what you love to do. And that's fucking awesome. There's thousands of people in a room right now just standing, waiting to see your face. And they like you. I liked you before I met you.


& Aaron: He doesn't need to be pushed on the stage right now. I...
    Sergio: Sometimes we gotta sacrifice one lamb, baby. It's gonna be all right. He's not gonna die!
    Aaron: You keep feeding him drugs and lies. He's a sad guy. He needs help.
    Sergio: He's gonna live a long time. Trust me. British motherfuckers don't die. You ever heard of a fucking... a British rock and roll star dying? No, none of them die. Mick Jagger. Keith Richards. Those Led Zeppelin... Them motherfuckers old as fuck! Fucking Ozzy Osbourne's gonna outlive Miley Cyrus!



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