Aldous Snow: Everyone is so excited about it. You must be, too. When people look back at musical history, they'll say, "Sergeant Pepper, African Child." That's what they'll probably say.
& Sergio: Fifteen thousand units! You made me vouch* for Chocolate Daddy! Fifteen thousand units! I got six fucking kids! You know how much money that is to put them through school? You know how many Air Jordans
six black kids wear?& Daphne: Just stay and watch Gossip Girl
with me.Aaron: Okay, well, then if you fall asleep,
Daphne: If you stay, I'll have sex with you.
Aaron: I feel like you're blackmailing me with your genitals. That's not fair.
Daphne: Well, then do it to me.
Aaron: Listen, if you don't go to that concert, you don't get any of my penis tonight.
Daphne: I think I'm gonna stay home.
Aaron: Doesn't work with the penis. No, it's not fair. Blackmail does not work with the penis. It doesn't work.
& Sergio: This is your fucking moment! You only get one moment in life. It's not hiding in some cubicle, answering some fucking phone. Can you handle it?
Aaron: Yeah. I can handle the moment.
Sergio: An artist is the slipperiest*, most conniving* motherfucker on the face of the earth. That's why you have to watch your tushie* while, at the same time, you make them feel like a star. It's called mind fucking. You ever been mind fucked before?
Aaron: I don't think so.
Sergio: I'm mind fucking you right now. Can you feel my dick fucking your mind?
Aaron: I don't... I can't really feel anything.
Sergio: See, that's it. That's the art of it! I'm mind fucking the shit out of you.
Aaron: ... I hope you're wearing a condom, 'cause I have a dirty mind. ... That was a joke.
Sergio: This is no time to joke. Mind fucking is not no joke.
& Sergio: Do you like his music?
Aaron: I love his music. Except for African Child. That album sucked.
Sergio: No. No. No. You love African Child. Your mother loves African Child. It's your girlfriend's favorite album. You love African Child. You bought 10 copies on the first day.
Aaron: Okay. Yeah, I love African Child. So lie to him.
Sergio: No! We don't lie to people. We don't do that. We just believe in valid truths.
& Aaron: Okay. Do you like African Child?
Sergio: Hell, fucking no. It was the most racist, condescending* shit ever made. What the fuck you calling me? A house nigger? Do I look like African Child?
Aaron: I don't... No.
Sergio: You just called me a fucking house nigger.
Aaron: No. I don't think you're a house N-word.
Sergio: No. I wasn't... No, I don't like fucking African Child. But if he asks me if I like African Child, I love that shit! I play that shit in my fucking sleep. I wake up to it and I brush my teeth to it. I love African Child.
Aaron: Okay. I got it.
Sergio: But, no, I don't love African Child. Don't ever ask me that fucking question again!
& Aldous: We're gonna fuck these two girls.
Aaron: I just got out of a relationship.
Aldous: Was your ex a blonde or brunette?
Aaron: Brunette.
Aldous: Blonde it is.
& Aldous: In future, if someone asks you to give them a critique of their work, don't rip out their fucking gizzards* and hold it in front of their face. What are you? What do you know?
Aaron: I'm sorry. Look, I don't know what I'm talking about.
Aldous: Yeah, what you did was very spiteful*. But it was also very brave and very honest, and I respect you for doing that, but the content of what you said has made me hate you. So there's a layer of respect, admittedly*, for your truthfulness, peppered with hate. Hateful respect.
& Aaron: Do you know the lyrics to "African Child"?
Drummer: I don't know the lyrics. I just bang the drum and do the African face.
& Aldous: I don't know the lyrics to African Child. I need you to get the lyrics.
I'm serious. I don't know the lyrics. I can't remember what the lyrics are.
Aaron: They're, like, the most simplest lyrics ever.
Aldous: Are they, mate? What are they?
Aaron: Yeah... Across the mystic desert is a desert that is mystic...
& Aldous: I need you to put this into your bottom hole.
Aaron: What?
Aldous: Put this into your rectum.
Aaron: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! What the fuck, man? What are you doing? We're in the middle of the airport!
Aldous: It's a necessary part of your job, Aaron. Don't be complicated.
& Aldous: The only logical thing to do in this situation is to put this deep in your asshole.
& Aaron: Hey, so I'm having a possible health issue with the talent.
Sergio: What kind of health issue? His eyes ain't rolling to the back of his head, are they?
Aaron: No. He wants me to put drugs up my ass. And I don't know what to do.
Sergio: Then you put the drugs up your ass. What's the problem?
Aaron: Please don't make me do that.
Sergio: This is the opportunity that you've been waiting for. You are now in the power position. You hold all the power in your ass.
-- Dict:
vouch — заявлять; объяснять; возражать; ручаться
slipperiest — =Not trustworthy; elusive or tricky.
conniving — потворство
tushie — =The buttocks.
condescending — снисходительный
gizzard — живот; горло; глотка
spiteful — злобный; ехидный; язвительный
admittedly — по общему признанию; предположительно
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