House M.D. 6x19

The Choice

Season 6, Episode 19

& House: Good morning.
    Cuddy: Hardly. One of my P.A.s quit an hour ago, and I have to reshuffle next month's schedule.
    House: That's nothing. I woke up in the wrong bed this morning.
    Nurse: Any bed you're in is the wrong one.


& 13: This is Dr. House. Aphasia and syncope.
    Patient's almost wife: He can't speak.
    House: "Aphasia" is Greek for loss of voice.
    Taub: We've ruled out infection, vocal cord damage, and stroke.
    House: A lot of guys syncope* at the altar. It's Greek for "having the vapors*."


& House: There's one thing they didn't test for. Faking.
    Patient: Ow!
    House: Test was positive.
    Patient: I-I can... I can talk. I-I wasn't faking. My voice just came back right now.
    Patient's almost wife: I know he wasn't faking.
    House: Well, if she's buying that, she might just be a keeper.
    Chase: Why would he fake anything?
    House: Kryo podia*. It's Greek for "duh." Still, you get to keep the engagement ring.


& Taub: I'm not that predictable. For example, you're probably not expecting me to ask you out for dinner tonight.
    House: No, thanks.
    Taub: You won't even consider it?
    House: I did, just very quickly.

---

& Patient's almost wife: Just breathe. Oh, my God.
    House: There's gotta be a better way to call off a wedding. A Tweet, for example.


& House: Okay, let's say all his symptoms are real. Explain how one of them suddenly went away without using the words "Virgin" and "Mary"?


& Patient: There may have been some contact, but I'm not gay.
    House: Sodomy, one of the top ten most common household accidents.


& Taub: I don't see anything wrong with him marrying a straight woman.
    13: How about, it'll make them both miserable?
    Chase: Just like most straight marriages. He's got the right to life, liberty, and unhappiness, like the rest of us.
    Taub: Absolutely no reason to look at me!


& Taub: So what caused the arrest?
    House: Four ways to stop a heart. Electrical problems, restricted blood flow, blood where it shouldn't be. Shocks, blocks, or bleeds.
    Taub: I think that's three things.
    House: And cheating. Oh, no. Sorry. That's how you break a heart.


& 13: I'm gonna check out this new lesbian bar tonight.
    House: Your life is awesome.
    13: You want to come?


& Wilson: I was telling a 33-year-old woman that she has breast cancer.
    House: No, you weren't.
    Wilson: How do you know?
    House: Because if you were, you'd need to see the pain in her eyes so she could see the concern in yours. Why are you setting me up on dates with my team? Taub asking me out was quirky*, but Thirteen doing it is a barking cat.
    Wilson: I'm doing it to help you.
    House: By setting me up with a hottie that I can't sleep with? {...} How much did you have to pay?
    Wilson: Nothing. ... I just told them you might be feeling down and it was in their self-interest to keep you company. ... 100 bucks. Foreman held out for 200.


& Wilson: House, I'm worried about you. You could have ended up in jail or worse.
    House: Racking* you with guilt. So I do something really stupid and you reward me. Read any parenting manual. That's not helping me. That's helping you.
    Wilson: Fine, I did it for me, for my relationship, out of pure self-interest.
    House: Okay.
    Wilson: You'll do it?
    House: For you.


& House: Any luck with the pottery?
    Taub: Wasn't easy. Bought a suitably cruddy* set of fife and drum napkin rings online. I got into a bidding war with some lunatic.
    House: Hey, could have gone a lot higher than $215.
    Taub: You're kissmyasthma99?


& 13: We've run every test that makes sense, asked every question we can think of, gone over his history a dozen times.
    Chase: We know how much we can trust his history.
    House: If history is written by the Victor, how do we find out what really happened?..
    Chase: ...Talk to the loser.


& House: Call the boyfriend. Let's get them all in the same room.
    Taub: Or we could question them separately and not torture them.
    House: Or we could get them all in the same room and get the truth.


& Chase: Oh. Drinks are on me and Foreman tonight.
    House: Can't. Pap smear*.
    Chase: We don't want to do it either, but Wilson already paid us.
    House: It's gonna suck.
    Chase: I know.
    House: Where and when?


& Wilson: Sounds like you had fun last night.
    House: You believe Chase?
    Wilson: I believe Foreman. And they had fun with you. What happened?
    House: I realized that they could be my friends.
    Wilson: You're serious?
    House: And then I sobered up*.


& Cuddy: You want to grab a bite to eat?
    House: So Wilson got to you too?
    Cuddy: No. This is just me.
    House: Lucas?
    Cuddy: Working late. I'm buying.
    House: I'm not that hungry.
    Cuddy: ... Okay. I just want us to be friends.
    House: Funny. That's the last thing I want us to be.



-- Dict:
syncope — обморок
vapors — испаряться
Kryo podia — =cold feet; см. также народный перевод
quirky — ловкий; ушлый; причудливый
Racking — Мучить; Изнурять
crud — чепуха
Pap smear — Мазок Папаниколау
sobered up — протрезвел



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