20 февр. 2016 г.

Legends of Tomorrow 1×1

Pilot, Part 1


& Captain Hunter: I’m not appealing to you as Time Masters, but as humans, please. Grant me the authority to change the timeline just this once.

& Captain Hunter: Set a course. United States. Star City. January, 2016.
    Gideon: Ah, the early second millennium A.D. The golden age of gasoline engines, online pornography, and those silly little smartphones.

& Gideon: You usually prefer to work alone, Captain.
    Rip Hunter: This time, I’ll need a team.

& Cops’ll never hassle a dad buying diapers in the middle of the night.

& Mick Rory: Aah. What a headache!

& Leonard Snart: You got the wrong guy. «Hero» ain’t on my resume.
    Mick Rory: Or mine.
    Rip Hunter: I know it’s difficult for you to fathom, but where... when I’m from, the year 2166, you and everyone on this roof aren’t just considered heroes... You’re legends. ....
    Prof. Stein: I, um, I hate to nitpick, but doesn’t a legend have to be dead?

& Arrow: So what do you know about Captain Hunter?
    Atom: He’s a Time Master from the 22nd century. It’s a little hard to Google.

& Atom: I died once. At least, the world thought I did. You know what happened?.. Nothing. All the money, all the buildings, all the inventions, the world didn’t care.


& Carter: 206 times. Savage has killed both of us 206 times.

& Mick Rory: We’re thieves. Crooks. Criminals. I have no desire to save the world. Especially 100 years after I’m dead.

& Leonard Snart: Why did we become criminals?
    Mick Rory: Because we hate working and we love money.

& Mick Rory: You want me in, I’m in. But I’m not gonna be anyone’s hero.

& Rip Hunter: I suggest you all strap yourselves in. Temporal navigation isn’t something one wants to be standing up for.

& Rip Hunter: Just hang on and remain calm.

& Frat Dude # 1: Whoa, that is some serious Darth Vader going on there.

& Frat Dude # 2: Hey, what you doing there, bro?
    Chronos: I am determining whether you are integral to the timeline.

& Rip Hunter: The further back in time you go, the worse the side effects. Better?
    Prof. Stein: It’s all relative.

& Mick Rory: Ah. Dollar beers. You got to love the ’70s.

& Jackson: So, we’re like the opposite of legends...
    Mick Rory: Give me one good reason why we shouldn’t kill you.

& Rip Hunter: One of the great lessons of time travel is that many things cannot be changed. Time wants to happen.

& Prof. Stein: And our malcontents?
    Mick Rory: I like killing people.

& Vandal Savage: History teaches us that the cause of humanity is only advanced through strife. There’s no Renaissance without the Dark Ages. Man had no interest in splitting the atom until World War II. I’m just trying to make this world a better place... one war at a time.

--
+ quotes on the IMDb

Σ Just hang on and remain calm.

Алекс Тарн — Пепел

AKA (Бог не играет в кости)



Берлиада — 2

(трилогия Шломо Бельского)
“цитаты

  “«А вот я тебя!..» — Берл сильно гребанул руками, для большей грозности задудев в дыхательную трубку. ...
&  Террор может обойтись без оружия, без обученных исполнителей, без сильных лидеров, без всего, кроме денег. Без денег террор бессилен.

&  И вот, представьте себе, что уже людей во все блоки набили столько, что не то что лечь – встать негде... а этих все везут и везут, везут и везут. Уже и дышать нечем, а их все везут. Ну как к ним после этого прикажете относиться? Я, честно говоря, евреев и так не очень-то жаловал, а тут просто невзлюбил. Ведь большинство болезней в лагере происходят от тесноты, Ваша честь. Теснота, если хотите знать, является главнейшим врагом человечества. Там, где одно человеческое существо об другое трется, неизбежно заводится какая-нибудь зараза: то ли бактерия, то ли вошь. Вши-то точно от трения межчеловеческого происходят, это я сам видел, гвоздики с колечками...


“цитатыПо-настоящему – это значит в науке выживания. Любой другой опыт – не настоящий. Я так думаю. Вернее, так меня учит мой собственный настоящий опыт, гвоздики с колечками. Так вот, по-настоящему опытный человек знает, что он действительно сотворен из глины, но подобен Богу.
     А практически это означает такую интересную вещь. Неважно, что делают с твоим телом, потому что это всего-навсего глина. Пусть себе мнут и давят, как угодно, лишь бы не отрывали от него куски, лишь бы потом можно было аккуратненько слепить себя заново. Но пока они это делают с глиной, ты должен обязательно помнить о своей богоподобности. А Бог, он ведь что сделал? – Сотворил этот мир, будь он прок... извините, Ваша честь, это меня куда-то не туда занесло. Я всего-то и хотел сказать, что в такие моменты нужно сотворить себе отдельный мир, но не такой, где гнут и корежат твою глину, а другой, замечательно красивый и очень удобный для повседневной человеческой жизни... и просто жить в нем, вот и все.
     А терпение всегда идет в зачет, особенно бескорыстное...

&  Поверьте, в моей душе эта волшебная ария звучит без малейшей фальши, с удивительной чистотой и силой. Просто поразительно, как это, выходя наружу, она превращается в такой ужасающе фальшивый скрежет?

&  Недаром Мудрец так любил занудно повторять ему на каждой ориентировке: «Не верьте стереотипам, Берл! Пройденные дороги не повторяются!»

&  Деньги приходят и уходят, а раз и навсегда заведенный порядок остается. Что дороже?



19 февр. 2016 г.

Joy

& Joy: I don’t WANNA work anything out, I just want to a nice, dumb sleep.

& Joy: When you’re hiding, you’re safe, because people can’t see you. But the funny thing about hiding... you’re even hidden from yourself.

& Trudy: Before he passed on to the next world, he made me promise, on his deathbed... that I would never be neglectful with one dollar... of the money that he so carefully earned. Therefore, you have to answer Maurice’s four questions of financial worthiness. Are you ready?.. Question number 1. Where did you go to high school? ... Question number 2. Who were you in high school? ....Morris’ third question. Are you prepared, within six months of commencing this venture, to show adequate returns? ...
    Joy: What is the fourth question?
    Trudy: You are in a room and there is a gun on the table, and the only other person in the room is an adversary in commerce. Only one of you can prevail. Yet, you have protected your business and Maurice’s money. Do you pick up the gun, Joy?
    Joy: That’s a very strange question.
    Trudy: There is nothing strange about this question at all. This is money. Do you pick up the gun?


& Neil Walker: You see those guys, I told them so many times, they still don’t understand. A very smart guy once said: Ya tell somebody something once, they don’t listen, ya tell somebody 4 times, they don’t listen, by the ninth time you say it, they begin to hear you. That’s why we’re on 24 hours a day.

& Neil: The stars are people, they always make the mistake of thinking it’s about the face, but it’s not, it’s about the hands. Because that’s what people use... they hold things they care about... and her hands are going to become their hands. And that becomes them, and then their voice and then their eyes. The stars always make the mistake. It’s really not the hands and the voice, that’s the heart of it.

& Trudy: 200,000 dollars.
    Rudy: 50,000 mops.

& Neil: This woman’s gonna be all business.

& Joy: Don’t ever think that the world owes you anything, because it doesn’t. The world doesn’t owe you a thing.

--
+ quotes on the IMDb

The Day Alex Left for College

Modern Family 7×2


& Jay: I can’t believe I’m saying this, once again, in only seven years of marriage, but please put the gun down.

& Mitchell: Let’s go, girls! Uh, pass and move! The players should never be standing still! The best defense is good offense... Well, now, that can’t be true.


+ quotes on the IMDb

18 февр. 2016 г.

The Valentino Submergence

The Big Bang Theory 9×15


& Howard: You’ve been talking about breaking up with Emily forever. Why don’t you just do it already?
    Leonard: Yeah, just get it over with.
    Raj: Well, you say it like it’s easy. Have any one of you ever broken up with anyone?

& Penny: So what did you say?
    Leonard: Thanks, sorry to bother you... But I said it like a badass!

& Leonard: A... a lot of attitude from the woman who thought MC squared was a rapper.
    Penny: Now, is that a smart thing to say on a holiday that’s basically national sex night?
    Leonard: I’m sorry. You’re pretty, I’m stupid.

& Leonard: What are you gonna say?
    Penny: I don’t know. I’m... I’m gonna flirt with him.
    Leonard: I don’t know if I’m comfortable with that...
    Penny: I’m still sleeping with you tonight!
    Leonard: See if you can get a table by the window.

& Penny: Come on, let’s get out of here.
    Leonard: What? Why?
    Penny: Because I’m young. Let’s go.


& Bernadette: It is Valentine’s Day. How about Valentino?
    Howard: Nice. A classic rabbit name. Peter Rabbit, Roger Rabbit. Valentino Wolowitz Rabbit.     Bernadette: Oh, look at all that chest hair and overbite. Of course you’re a Wolowitz.

& Howard: Son of a bitch! He bit me!
    Bernadette: Are you okay?
    Howard: No, I’m not okay! Wild rabbits can have rabies!

& Bernadette: He’s so little. I’m sure it’s fine.
    Howard: How can it be fine? I just got attacked by a clearly anti-Semitic wild animal!

& Penny: Can you believe when I met you I was 22? I mean, it’s crazy! Where did all that time go?
    Leonard: Mm, you watched The Bachelor a lot.

& Bernadette: We’ll find another time to tell him I’m pregnant...
Ω Finally.

& Sheldon: Well, you know, here is something that might cheer you up. The flag of the Isle of Man is nothing but three legs sharing a weird pair of underpants, so... you think you got problems.

& Penny: Cleaning up is not young and fun.

--
On the IMDb

Xtabai


Mad Dogs × 2


& Cobi: The Cat said we had 24 hours to return the boat. What time, exactly, did he say that?

& Lex: Oh, so-so I’m punished for having a sense of direction?
    Cobi: Well, I’m the money guy. I should stay with the money.

& Cobi: It’s fucked up, is what it is.
    Lex: «Ex-tah-bee.» Xtabai.

& Cyclist: Fil mishmish. Tomorrow we have apricots.

& Lex: Hey, you faked some credentials, she fakes an orgasm... Everybody wins.


& Gus: We’re not gonna make it out of this, are we?

& Gus: So-so the car’s got a little damage, and we just need to return it for something a bit more, um, drivable.
    Cobi: Yeah, it was a good thing we got all that insurance.

& Angel: And this is legal?
    Cobi: Barely. Ha. So, yeah.

& Sophia: So you are just locked in forever...
    Gus: Hope not.
    Sophia: Maybe you and I can talk here. Just like in jail.

--
On the IMDb

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Windmills

The Expanse 1×7


& Miller: Some people aren’t worth saving.

& Chrisjen: Printed books... We don’t see these much anymore. Are they antique?

& Chrisjen: Cervantes...
    Elise: Jimmy liked to think of himself as a knight. He thought it was a funny story. I never broke it to him that it was a tragedy.


& Amos: We’re just caught up in the churn, is all.
    Kenzo: I have no idea what you just said.
    Amos: This boss I used to work for in Baltimore, he called it the churn. When the rules of the game change.
    Kenzo: What game?
    Amos: The only game. Survival. When the jungle tears itself down, and builds itself into somethin’ new. Guys like you and me, we end up dead. It doesn’t really mean anything. Or we happen to live through it, and well, that doesn’t mean anything either.

& Alex: Donkey balls.

& Miller: Bad timing. My specialty.

--
On the IMDb

17 февр. 2016 г.

West Side Story

Two and a Half Men 11×18


& Barry: Kate was the great love of his life, who he met by pretending to be poor. By the time he told her the truth, she’d become a successful designer and moved to China. At first, they e-mailed frequently, but it tapered off over time. Now he just uses Google Earth to look in her bedroom window. But the image hasn’t refreshed, so he just stares for hours at a photo of a Hong Kong cab driver named Bao Ling...

& Barry: If you don’t want me to know, come up with a harder password. «Q-D-backslash-seven-two dollar-symbol big-C-little-K»...


& Gretchen: Jeff, do you not want me to see your place? You’re worried about your porn? Don’t. I love porn.
    Alan: You’re perfect.

& Berta: Puking all night and screwing all day. It’s like Charlie never left.

--
+ quotes on the IMDb

Lucifer 1×1

Pilot


& Polce Officer: You know why I pulled you over?
    Lucifer: Well, obviously, you felt the need to exercise your limited powers and punish me for ignoring the speed limit. It’s okay. I understand. I-I like to punish people, too. Or at least I used to.

& Amenadiel: Your return to the Underworld has been requested.
    Lucifer: Oh, right, okay. Let me just, uh, check my calendar. Yeah, here it is. Uh, the seventh of never through to the 15th of ain’t-gonna-happen.

& Lucifer: Do you think I’m the Devil because I’m inherently evil, just because dear old Dad decided I was?..

& Delilah: With all the good came a hell of a lot of bad.
    Lucifer: Oh, right, so the Devil made you do it, did he? The alcohol and the drugs, the topless selfies... The choices are on you, my dear.

& Chloe: «Lucifer Morningstar»? Is that, uh, a stage name or something?
    Lucifer: God-given, I’m afraid.

& Lucifer: Oh, no, he wasn’t quite dead. His soul hadn’t crossed the threshold.

& 2Vile: «Lucifer Morningstar»? Now, that’s a good hip-hop name.

& 2Vile: What, you don’t like hip-hop?
    Lucifer: No, I most certainly do not.
    2Vile: Well, that offends me. You have a problem with black people?
    Lucifer: No, not in the slightest. I just hate your music. And when I say «your music,» I mean your music. Not the music made by other black people. Without the blues, there’d be no devil’s music whatsoever. There are, of course, many giants in the field.


& Chloe: How could you possibly help me?
    Lucifer: I have a certain skill set. I can be very persuasive with people and tend to see things that others cannot.
    Chloe: So, you’re psychic or something?
    Lucifer: No, I can’t read people’s minds. I’m not a Jedi. People just like to tell me things.

& Lucifer: I have no power over people’s sins. I actually get a bad rap for that. I have the ability to draw out people’s forbidden desires. The more simple the human, the easier it is. The more complex, the more challenging and exciting, really. But no, the actual sins, the sins are on you people.

& Chloe: .....when I say to shut up and get in the damn car.
    Lucifer: You’re not, like, a Jedi or something, are you?

& Beatrice: Like the Devil??
    Lucifer: Exactly.

& Beatrice: Bye, Lucifer. It was nice meeting you.

& Lucifer: That is interesting ’cause... you don’t look at me that way.
    Chloe: What way?
    Lucifer: With carnal fascination.

& Chloe: Truth be told, I find you repulsive. Like, on a chemical level.

& Lucifer: My word is my bond.

& Chloe: Mr. Cooper, when did you last have contact with Delilah?
    Lucifer: Well, actually, I just have one more question before you proceed with the boring ones... Tell me, Mr. Cooper, what do you want more than anything in this world? What’s your deepest, darkest desire? You close your eyes, what do you see?

& Chloe: God, what am I doing here?
    Lucifer: Wrong deity, but, yes, that is the eternal question.

& Chloe: Who the hell are you?
    Lucifer: I told you, I’m...
    Beatrice: Lucifer!

& Maze: Stop caring. You’re the Devil.
    Lucifer: Yes. I am.

--
+ quotes on the IMDb

+ Soundtracks!

Σ Enjoyment.

Colony 1×1

Pilot


& Forecaster: It’s gonna be another boring, beautiful day today in Los Angeles with a high of 70.

& Will: Eggs are not gross. Eggs are just un-hatched baby chickens.

& Cellmate: No one ever sees them.

& Proxy Governor Alan Snyder: Even the most successful men make two or three critical mistakes in their lives. It’s what they do afterward that defines them.


& Snyder: I also made some coffee. One of the little luxuries we took for granted before our current situation.

& Snyder: I wanted this to be more of a surprise, but um... Your bar? The Yo... Yo...
    Katie: Yoknapatawpha. We called it The Yonk.

& Katie: The Occupation just hired my husband to hunt us down.

--
On the IMDb

Алекс Тарн — Боснийская спираль

AKA (Они всегда возвращаются)

Берлиада — 1

(трилогия Шломо Бельского)
цитаты | Боснийская спираль | Алекс Тарн | Они всегда возвращаются | Берлиада | spy | Mossad | Holocaust
  “Берл вышел из машины, и полуденный иерусалимский зной, по-приятельски обхватив за плечи, жарко дохнул ему в лицо горьковатым запахом раскаленной земли и хвои. ...
&  – ... Кто вообще читает сообщения о судебных провалах, набранные мелким шрифтом между светскими новостями и биржевыми сводками? Шум, шум, шум!.. – вот двигатель современного мира!

&  Увы, молодой человек, честолюбие хуже наркотика – даже самые сильные почести и похвалы приносят всего лишь кратковременное удовлетворение. Как бы громко ни гремело имя честолюбца, ему непременно хочется еще. Еще громче, еще ярче, еще шире...

Люди на войне делятся на две категории: тех, кто убивает, и тех, кто прячется.

&  Если не хочешь, чтобы другие задавали тебе вопросы, спрашивай сам.

&  Не каждую возможность выжить можно использовать. Даже когда она единственная.

&  Английский с его встроенным независимым сарказмом намного лучше подходит человеку со связанными руками.

&  «Сильна, как смерть, любовь...» – откуда это, Габо?
     Так написано в книге, девочка, в самой большой из книг.


цитаты | Боснийская спираль | Алекс Тарн | Они всегда возвращаются | Берлиада | spy | Mossad | Holocaust&  Любовь не умеет стоять на месте, ей всегда мало того, что есть, она должна непрерывно расширяться, захватывать все новые и новые территории, без конца, пока не подчинит себе весь мир. А что потом? А потом она умирает. – Умирает? – Ну да... Умирает от голода, потому что больше уже не осталось ничего для ее ненасытной силы. – Тогда зачем давать ей расти, если она все равно умрет? – Ну как же... если не давать ей расти, то она просто умрет маленькой, вот и все.

&  Отчего мы не первые люди на Земле? Зачем тут это двуногое зверье? Что оно делает здесь, в нашем мире? Оно врывается к нам и убивает нас – нашей ли смертью или своей, убивает в любом случае, даже если мы остаемся жить, а оно погибает от нашей руки.

&  Месть – как соленая вода из Мертвого моря, не утоляет жажды. ... Месть не принесет облегчения – она только добавит тебе новой боли. Не вылечит – добавит!

&  Он ведь был деятельным человеком. Никогда не ждал, когда к нему что-то само приплывет. Хочешь, чтобы жизнь твоя стала лучше – исправь ее. Все просто.

&  – Не тушуйся, девочка. Ты права. Поняла? Ты права, а они, крысы, виноваты. И слабость твоя тоже права: нормального человека должно тошнить от убийства. А если не тошнит, то он уже ненормален... В этом, если хочешь знать, их самая главная крысиная пакость: они заставляют нас убивать. Гады. Они убивают нас так или иначе. Превращают или в трупы, или в бесчувственных монстров, и неизвестно еще, что хуже.
     – Известно... – пробормотала Энджи.
     – Что? – переспросил он, не расслышав.
     – Ты просто не знаешь, но есть еще и третье состояние, самое худшее... Ты и не труп, и не монстр... ты – вонючая тряпка, выброшенный в кювет презерватив, до горла набитый мерзкой спермой насильников... Ты настолько грязна, что отвратительна самой себе, ты скребешь себя до крови и не можешь очиститься, даже если соскребешь все мясо до самых костей, понимаешь? Потому что кости тоже осквернены... Все осквернено – до самого мозга... А в голове – их морды, их невыносимая вонь, въевшаяся в тебя... Что делать тогда, а, Берл? Скажи мне, если ты такой умный!.. Ага, молчишь?..
  ... На пороге — бородатая вонючая смерть в овчинном полушубке.”




16 февр. 2016 г.

The Big Short

& ’It ain’t what you don’t know that gets you into trouble. It’s what you know for sure that just ain’t so.’
Mark Twain

& Jared Vennett: In the late seventies banking wasn’t a job you went into to make large sums of money. It was a fucking snooze! Filled with losers! Like selling insurance, or accounting and if banking was boring... then the bond department at the bank was straight up comatose. ... That is until Lewis Rainieri came on the scene at Salomon Brothers. You might not know who he is but he changed your life more than Michael Jordan, the I-pod and YouTube put together!

& Jared Vennett: You see, Lewis didn’t know it yet, but he already changed banking forever with one simple idea...
    Lewis Rainieri: The mortgage backed security. Or... private label MBS. You got your average persons mortgage fixed rate, thirty years, boring! Same, small payoff. Right? But!.. When you add thousands of them all bundled together suddenly, the yield goes up, but the risk is still small, because... Well, they’re mortgages, and who the hell doesn’t pay their mortgage?
    Michigan State Pension Fund: What exactly is the credit-rating on this bond?
    Lewis Rainieri: This bond gentlemen... is AAA-rating!

& Jared Vennett: ... The money came raining down! And for the first time, the banker went from the country-club to the strip-club.

& Jared Vennett: Mortgage backed securities, sub-prime loans, tranches... is pretty confusing, right? Doesn’t it make you feel bored... Or stupid... Well... it’s supposed to. Wall-street loves to use confusing terms, to make you think only they can do what they do. Or even better... For you just to leave them the fuck alone. So... here’s Margot Robbie in a bubble-bath to explain.

& Margot Robbie: Basically, Lewis Rainieri’s mortgage bonds were amazingly profitable for the big banks. But then they ran out of mortgages to put in them. After all, there are only so many homes and so many people with good enough jobs to buy them... right? So the banks started filling these bonds with riskier and riskier mortgages ... that way, they can keep that profit machine churning right? By the way, these risky mortgages are called: Sub-prime. So... Whenever you hear sub-prime... think: Shit! Our friend Michael Burry found out, that these mortgages bonds that were supposedly 65 percent AAA, were actually just, basically full of shit. So now he’s going to short the bonds which means... bet against. Got it?... Good! Now fuck off!

& Michael Burry: This is not crazy... It’s all very logical.
    Lawrence: So now we pay up premiums on these swaps against housing-market until the mortgages fail? In other words... We lose millions until something that has never happened before... happens?
    Michael Burry: That’s correct!

& Danny Moses: No, that can’t be right, there, there, are 500 billion in housing bonds sold last year alone ratings agencies, the banks... The fucking government? You’re saying they’re all asleep at the wheel?
    Jared Vennett: Yeah. My whole department is long on this stuff. They call me chicken little. They call me bubble-boy. A’s... zero. B’s... Zero, BB’s... zero. BBB’s... zero. And then... that happens!
    Mark Baum: What... is that?
    Jared Vennett: That’s America’s housing market.


& Charlie Geller: Our investment-strategy was simple. People hate to think about bad things happening so they always underestimate their likelihood.
    Jared Vennett: Their strategy simple and brilliant.
    Jamie Shipley: What he said!
    Jared Vennett: Jamie and Charlie found: Markets will sell options very cheaply on things they think will never happen. So, when they were wrong, they were wrong small. But when they were right... They were right big! Boooooom! Within a few years they had turned a 110 grand into 30 million then it was time to go to New York City...

& Overheard at a Washington, D.C. bar: «Truth is like poetry. And most people fucking hate poetry.»

& Mark Baum: I don’t get it... Why are they confessing?
    Danny Moses: They’re not confessing...
    Porter Collins: They’re bragging!

& Jamie Shipley: Ben, why do you do that man? You’re a retired trader, ok? No-one is listening to your calls!
    Ben Rickert: The NSA has a 52 billion dollar budget and the ability to tens of millions calls a second, you think they’re not using it?
    Jamie Shipley: Ok, I promise I will refrain from saying, Ben Rickert and dirty bomb in the same sentence... Jesus!

& Mark Baum: Just answer the question Georgia, can you name one time in the past year? Where you checked the tape and you didn’t give the banks the AAA-percentage they wanted?
    Georgia Hale: If we don’t give them the ratings, they’ll go to Moody’s right down the block. If we don’t work with them they will go to our competitors not our fault, simply the way the world works.
    Mark Baum: Holy shit!
    Georgia Hale: Ah yes, now you see it! And I never said that!
    Vinnie Daniel: You’re selling ratings for fee’s... a ratings shop.
    Mark Baum: You could afford to make less, make less.
    Georgia Hale: Nobody said that! And it is not my decision, I have a boss.

& Jared Vennett: Tell me the difference between stupid and illegal and I’ll have my wife’s brother arrested.

& Jared Vennett: Yes, there’s some shady shit going down! But trust me, it’s fueled by stupidity!... Look at yourselves! You know you passed yourselves off as cynical people but... You still have some faith in the system don’t you?

& Michael Burry: It’s possible that we are in a completely fraudulent system.
    Lewis: Or... you’re, you’re wrong.
    Michael Burry: Sure! It’s possible, I just don’t know how!
    Lewis: I guess... When... Someone’s wrong, they never... They never... Know how!
    Michael Burry: See you in the morning!

& Ben Rickert: Do you have any idea what you just did?
    Charlie Geller: Come on, we just made the deal of our lifetime, we should celebrate!
    Ben Rickert: You just bet against the American economy!
    Charlie Geller: Fuck yeah we did!
    Ben Rickert: Which means! Which means... If we’re right... If we’re right, people lose homes! People lose jobs! People lose retirement savings, people lose pensions! You know what I hate about fucking banking! It reduces people to numbers! Here’s a number! Every one percent unemployment goes up, 40 thousand people die! Did you know that?! Did you know that?
    Charlie Geller: No, I didn’t know that!
    Jamie Shipley: We were just excited!
    Ben Rickert: Just don’t fucking dance!

& Mark Baum: So let me get this straight. The bank calls you up. They give you the bonds they wanna sell, they give you clients, they give you money to run your business, give you fat fee’s for doing so, but you represent the investors? Is that right?
    Mr. Chau: Yeah! But we’re not in the Merrill-Lynch building!
    Mark Baum: Ok, where are you?
    Mr. Chau: We’re in New Jersey!
    Mark Baum: You’re twenty minutes away!
    Mr. Chau: Five, if you use the helicopter!

& Mark Baum: Hold on, say that again! CDO A has parts of CDO B, and CDO B has parts of CDO A, and then they both get put inside CDO C.
    Mr. Chau: Yeah, and that one is called CDO square! A CDO of a CDO! Right? And then there’s CDO’s made up of the opposite sides of the bet you made with the swaps. We call them, synthetic CDO’s
    Mark Baum: What did you just say? Synthetic CDO’s? That is fucking crazy!
    Mr. Chau: It’s not! It’s awesome!

& Jared Vennett: If the mortgage bonds were the match... Then the CDO’s were the kerosene soaked rags. Then the synthetic CDO was the atomic bomb with a drunk president holding his finger over the button. It was at that moment in that dumb restaurant with that stupid look on his face that Mark Baum realized the whole world economy might collapse!

& Jared Vennett: And I know what you’re thinking! What the fuck is a synthetic CDO? Well, here’s Dr. Thaler, father of behavioral economics, and Selena Gomez to explain!
    Selena Gomez: Ok, so here’s how a synthetic CDO works! Let’s say I bet ten million on a black Jack hand.
    Dr. Thaler: Ten million, because this hand is to represent a single mortgage bond... Okay, Selena has a pretty good hand here! Showing eighteen, dealer showing seven that’s a really good hand for Selena! Good odds, in fact her chances of winning this hand are eighty-seven percent.
    Selena Gomez: So, my odds are good. I’m on a winning streak. Everybody in this place wants to get in on the action. How could I lose, right?
    Dr. Thaler: Now this is a classic error. In basketball it’s called the hot-hand-fallacy. A player makes a bunch of shots in a row. People are sure they’re gonna make the next one. People think, whatever is happening now is gonna continue to happen into the future! During the real-estate boom markets were going up and up! And people thought they would never go down!
    Selena Gomez: So, people who are watching and think that I won’t lose will make a side-bet. Now this is the first synthetic CDO.
    Woman in Glasses: I love Selena Gomez! I’ll bet you fifteen million, she wins! And I’ll give you 3-to-1 odds!
    Businessman at Casino: 3-to-1 odds? Okay, I’ll take that bet!
    Dr. Thaler: Now, somebody else is gonna wanna make a bet on the outcome of their bet! That will lead to synthetic CDO number two!
    Guy in Game Jersey: Hey! I bet you 200 million, that lady in the glasses wins that bet!
    Woman at Casino: She probably will win! So I want great pay-off!
    Guy in Game Jersey: How about 20-to-1?
    Woman at Casino: Deal!
    Selena Gomez: And this will go on and on, with more and more synthetic CDO’s.
    Dr. Thaler: And we can transform an original ten million dollar investment into billions of dollars.


& Mr. Chau: You’re ok?
    Mark Baum: No! I actually feel pretty sick!

& Mark Baum: Short everything that man has touched.

& Charlie Geller: Will you listen to me! This is like... the end of capitalism! This is like the dark ages all-over again! ... I don’t want to talk to dad! ... Okay, I love you too, save your money! She says I need to be on Xanax, and double my dose of Zoloft.

& Mark Baum: We live in an era of fraud in America. Not just in banking, but in government, education, religion, food. Even baseball...

& Michael Burry: ’People... want an authority to tell them how to value things, but they chose this authority not based on facts or... results. They chose it because it seems authoritative... Or familiar! And... I’m not, and never have been... familiar. So... So I’ve come to the solemn realization that I must close down the fund. Sincerely, Michael J. Burry MD.’

& Mark Baum: I have a feeling, that in a few years, people are gonna do, what they always do when the economy tanks. They will be blaming immigrants and poor people.
    Jared Vennett: But Mark was wrong! In the years that followed, hundreds of bankers and rating-agency’s executives went to jail. The SCC was completely overhauled and Congress had no choice, but to break up the big banks and regulate the mortgage and derivative industries... Just kidding! Banks took the money the American people gave them and used it to pay themselves huge bonuses and lobby the Congress to kill big reform and then they blamed immigrants and poor people and this time even teachers! And when all was said and done, only one single banker went to jail, this poor schmuck! Kareem Serageldin from Credit Suisse. He hit a few billion in mortgage-bond losses, something most of the big banks did on a good day during the crisis.

--
+ quotes on the IMDb

15 февр. 2016 г.

Steve Jobs

& Steve Jobs: Two days ago, we ran a Super Bowl ad that could’ve won the Oscar for Best Short Film. There are more people who can tell you about the ad than can tell you who won the game.
    Joanna Hoffman: I understand, but the ad said the Mac was gonna save the world. It didn’t say it was gonna say hello.

& Joanna: Why can’t he get into the machine?
    Andy Hertzfeld: You need special tools.
    Joanna: What kind of special tools? Just take a screwdriver.
    Andy: He didn’t want users to be able to open it. You need special tools.
    Joanna: Is this for real?

& Joanna: We’re not gonna sell a million in the first 90 days.
    Steve Jobs: Everyone, everyone, everyone, everyone is waiting for the Mac!
    Joanna: Maybe. But what happens when they find out that for 2,495, there’s nothing you can do with it? We were competitive at $1,500, but once you replaced the Motorola 6809 with the 68000...
    Steve Jobs: Which is what supports menus, windows, point and click, high-res graphics...
    Joanna: Yeah, ’cause everyone needs rectangles with rounded corners.
    Steve Jobs: Coach lands on the runway at the exact same time as first class.
    Joanna: I don’t have the first fucking idea what that means, but this is how it got to $2,500... which is the price point on the PC, which can do a lot more!
    Steve Jobs: Who’s gonna want a PC? What idiot is gonna want... If I wanna tell you there’s a spot on your shirt, I point to the spot. I don’t say there’s a spot 14 centimeters down from the collar and three centimeters to the right of the second button while I try to remember what the command is for club soda. That’s not how a person’s mind works.
    Joanna: If the goal was ease of use, maybe you should’ve given it some memory.
    Steve Jobs: You can complain about memory or you can complain about price, but you can’t do both at the same time. Memory is what costs money. I’m glad you’re telling me your feelings about the Mac now because we have a half hour left. We can redesign it.

& Steve Jobs: Look at their faces when they see what it is. They won’t know what they’re looking at or why they like it, but they’ll know they want it.

& Lisa: My dad named a computer after me.
    Steve Jobs: I’m not your... Actually, do you know what a coincidence is, Lisa?
    Lisa: No.
    Steve Jobs: Like if you met someone. You made a new friend and her name was Lisa too. That would be a coincidence. «Lisa» stands for «Local Integrated Systems Architecture.» L-I-S-A. It’s a coincidence.


& Andy: Well, we’re not a pit crew at Daytona. This can’t be fixed in seconds.
    Steve Jobs: You didn’t have seconds. You had three weeks. The universe was created in a third of that time.
    Andy: Well, someday you’ll have to tell us how you did it.

& Steve Jobs: Here’s what I’m gonna do. I’m gonna announce the names of everyone who designed the launch demo. I’m gonna introduce everyone and ask them to stand up. The bag was designed by Susan Kare. The Macintosh font that’s scrolling across the screen was designed by Steve Capps. The starry night and skywriting was Bruce Horn. MacPaint, MacWrite, Alice, down to the calculator. And then I’m gonna say the voice demo that didn’t work was designed by Andy Hertzfeld.
    Andy: Steve...
    Steve Jobs: Five-in-six is your chance of surviving the first round of Russian roulette, and you’ve reversed those odds. So unless you wanna be disgraced in front of your friends, family, colleagues, stockholders and the press, I wouldn’t stand here arguing. I’d go try and get some more bullets out of the gun.

& Steve Jobs: We’re about to do this thing. At 9:41, the planet’s gonna shift on its axis nigh and forever.

& Steve Jobs: Two most significant events of the 20th century: the Allies win the war and this. This. So maybe right now isn’t the very best time to scold me for not being a better father to a kid who’s not my kid.

& Steve Wozniak: Computers aren’t paintings.
    Steve Jobs: Fuck you. I’m gonna say «fuck you» every time you say that until you either die or stop.

& Steve Jobs: It’s having no control. You find out you were out of the loop when the most crucial events in your life were set in motion. As long as you have control. I don’t understand people who give it up.

& Steve Jobs: I once met Seiji Ozawa at Tanglewood. A thunderous conductor. Ungodly artfulness and nuance. And I asked him what exactly a conductor does that a metronome can’t. Surprisingly, he...
    Wozniak: He didn’t beat the living shit out of you?
    Steve Jobs: That’s right. No, he said, «The musicians play their instruments. I play the orchestra.»
    Wozniak: That feels like something that sounds good, but doesn’t mean anything. ...

& Wozniak: What did you do? What did you do? Why has Lisa not heard of me?
    Steve Jobs: Shit, man, how many fourth-graders have heard of you?
    Wozniak: You can’t write code. You’re not an engineer. You’re not a designer. You can’t put a hammer to a nail. I built the circuit board. The graphical interface was stolen from Xerox PARC. Jef Raskin was the leader of the Mac team before you threw him off his own project. Everything... Someone else designed the box. So how come 10 times in a day, I read «Steve Jobs is a genius»? What do you do?
    Steve Jobs: I play the orchestra.

& Joanna: Tell me what the plan is. You have to tell me the plan, because I don’t know. You’re walking around like you’ve got «Can’t Lose» cards.
    Steve Jobs: The plan will reveal itself to you when you’re ready to see it.
    Joanna: Will I have to drop acid?
    Steve Jobs: Couldn’t hurt.
    Joanna: Is there a plan?
    Steve Jobs: Have I ever let you down?
    Joanna: Every single goddamn time.
    Steve Jobs: Then I’m due.
    Joanna: Is there?
    Steve Jobs: Joanna, there’s a plan. I just don’t wanna put you in a position where you’re lying to people.

& John Sculley: There is no market research telling us the Mac is failing because it’s overpriced. It’s telling us that people don’t like it because they think it doesn’t do anything. It’s closed, end-to-end. We didn’t know it wasn’t what people wanted, but it isn’t. They want slots, they want choices, they want options. The way we buy stereos... mix and match components.
    Steve Jobs: John, listen to me. Whoever said the customer is always right was, I promise you, a customer.

& John Sculley: It had skinheads in it. She was liberating them. Liberating the skinheads.
    Steve Jobs: The ad didn’t have anything to do with fucking skinheads. We used them as fucking extras. Nobody even knows they were skinheads.

& John Sculley: It was a suicide. Because you knew your cards and I showed you mine. I showed you mine, and you did it anyway. What did you think I was gonna do? I’m okay losing, but I’m not gonna forfeit.
    Steve Jobs: I’m not okay losing.

& Joel Pforzheimer: Who’s this one?
    Steve Jobs: Alan Turing. Single-handedly won World War II and, for an encore, invented the computer. He won’t be part of the campaign though.
    Joel Pforzheimer: Why not?
    Steve Jobs: ’Cause you just had to ask me who he was.

& Joel Pforzheimer: He killed himself by taking a bite of a poison apple... Alan Turing.
    Steve Jobs: Yeah. There should be statues of that man. His name should be on the lips of schoolchildren.
    Joel Pforzheimer: The rainbow flag apple with a bite taken out... That’s where it came from?
    Steve Jobs: No, we picked it off a list of friendly-sounding words. But wouldn’t it be great if that had been the story behind it?

& Wozniak: You know, when people used to ask me what the difference was between me and Steve Jobs, I would say Steve was the big-picture guy and I liked a solid workbench. When people ask me what the difference is now, I say «Steve’s an asshole.»... Your products are better than you are, brother.
    Steve Jobs: That’s the idea, brother. And knowing that, that’s the difference.
    Wozniak: It’s not binary. You can be decent and gifted at the same time.

& Steve Jobs: It was the stylus, John. I killed the Newton because of the stylus. If you’re holding a stylus, you can’t use the other five that are attached to your wrist... Things we could have done together.
    John Sculley: God, the things we could’ve done...

& Steve Jobs: Of course it was named after you. Local Integrated System Architecture doesn't even mean anything.
    Lisa: Why'd you say it wasn't all those years?
    Steve Jobs: I honestly don't know.
    Lisa: Why'd you say you weren't my father?
    Steve Jobs: ... I'm poorly made.

& Steve Jobs: I’m gonna put music in your pocket.
    Lisa: What?
    Steve Jobs: Hundred songs. A thousand songs. 500 songs. Somewhere between 500 and a thousand songs right in your pocket, ’cause I can’t stand looking at that inexplicable Walkman anymore. You’re carrying around a brick playing cassette tape. We’re not savages.

& Joanna Hoffman: Ladies and gentlemen, Steve Jobs.

--
+ quotes on the IMDb

Nothing Resonates Like Rhinoceros Foreskin

Mozart in the Jungle 2×2


& Lizzie: Hailey, listen, I almost fell in an active volcano twice. I ate jellyfish every day for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. And if I learned anything, I learned that there’s no time for bullshit.

& Bradford: Tap it as softly as you can. ... Nothing resonates like rhinoceros foreskin.

& Lizzie: Guess what I’ve been trying to say is, you can choose what you wanna see. It’s up to you. Like, right now, what do you see?

& Rodrigo: Last night’s performance was not bad. But it was also not not bad. Understand what I’m saying?


& Rodrigo: This ice feels very good to me. And now... I cannot hear you. Because I’m listening to Igor Fyodorovich Stravinsky. Which, by the way, I’m sure he used to love ice skating. Russians, you know?

& Gloria: [It] Even makes me want to twerp out an Instapic... is that right?

& Rodrigo: So, Einojuhani Rautavaara and Jean Sibelius are born in the same country, right?
    Mike: Finland.
    Rodrigo: That was easy. Okay, Toscanini, before he became a conductor, what instrument did he play?
    Mike: The cello. ...
    Rodrigo: Okay, which composer was driven into a monastic lifestyle after the Pope denied his lover permission to marry him?... Whoa!

--
On the IMDb

+ Soundtracks.

14 февр. 2016 г.

Spotlight

& Marty Baron: I’d like to challenge the protective order in the Geoghan case.
    Publisher: You want to sue the Catholic Church?

& Mitchell Garabedian: The Church thinks in centuries, Mr. Rezendes. Do you think your paper has resources to take that on?

& Sacha Pfeiffer: Can you tell me specifically what happened?
    Joe: Specifically... He molested me.
    Sacha Pfeiffer: Joe, I think that the language is going to be so important here. We can’t sanitize this, just saying ’molest’ isn’t enough. People need to know what actually happened.
    Joe: ..... We should probably get these to go.

& Mitchell Garabedian: Really? East Boston? You don’t sound like it... This city. This people. Making the rest of us feel like we don’t belong. But they’re no better than us. Look at how they treat their children... Mark my words Mr. Rezendes, if it takes the village to raise the child, it takes the village to abuse one.


& Walter ’Robby’ Robinson: We got a story about degenerate clergy. And we got a story about a bunch of lawyers... turning child abuse into a cottage industry. Now, which story do you want us to write? Cause we’re writing one of them.

& Mike Rezendes: ...so I could just walk in to that courthouse right now... and get those documents?
    Mitchell Garabedian: No, you can not. Because the documents are not there.
    Mike Rezendes: But you just said they’re public.
    Mitchell Garabedian: I know I did. But this is Boston. And the Church does not want them to be found, so, they are not there.
    Mike Rezendes: Mitch, are you telling me that the Catholic Church... removed legal documents from that courthouse?
    Mitchell Garabedian: Look, I’m not crazy, I’m not paranoid. I’m experienced. Check the docket, you’ll see. They control everything. Everything.

& Mike Rezendes: Looks like everybody already knows the story.
    Robinson: Yeah, except us... and we work right there.

--
+ quotes on the IMDb

Rock Bottom

The Expanse 1×6


& Johnson: You either some kind of genius, Mr. Holden, or you the luckiest dipshit in the solar system.

& Dawes: Do you know it is possible to cry so hard that your tears turn to blood?


& Miller: You know, every time you remember something, your mind changes it, just a little, until your best and your worst memories, they’re your biggest illusions.

--
+ quotes on the IMDb

13 февр. 2016 г.

My Struggle

The X-Files 10×1


& Fox Mulder: ...now people only laugh, and only Roswell is remembered. But we must ask ourselves... are they really a hoax? Are we truly alone? Or are we being lied to?

& Doctor: How much longer?
    Agent: Two shakes of a lamb’s tail, Doc.

& Mulder: I thought you were done with UFOs. The stranglehold they put on your very existence, I believe is how you put it.

& Dana Scully: Uber?
    Mulder: Hitchhiked.

& Tad O’Malley: Funny. I heard you were funny.

& O’Malley: Allow me my small precautions. Low-flying aircraft often employ what they call «dirtboxes» to record conversations that I prefer private.
    Dr. Scully: Aircraft employed by whom?
    O’Malley: I’m afraid I can only speculate.

& O’Malley: I’m not some Johnny-come-lately to the UFO phenomenon, Mr. Mulder. Like yourself, I’m a true believer.
    Mulder: No, I only want to believe. Actual proof has been strangely hard to come by.


& Mulder: Conspiracy sells— it pays for bulletproof limousines.

& Mulder: Gravity warp drive— but how?
    Garner: Element 115. Ununpentium.
    Mulder: Where did you get it?

& Mulder: Scully, listen to me. I’ve been misled. We’ve been misled. ... What if everything we’ve been led to believe in is a lie? What if there is no alien conspiracy?

& Mulder: It’s about controlling the past to control the future. It’s about fiction masquerading as fact.

& Doctor: The lies are so great, Mr. Mulder. The truth must be unassailable.

& Doctor: You’re nearly there. You’re close.

& Doctor: Roswell... That was a smokescreen.
    Mulder: So I’ve been told.

& Mulder: She’s the key to everything. Sveta... is the key.

& Dr. Scully: The takeover of America.
    O’Malley: By a well-oiled and well-armed multinational group of elites that will cull, kill and subjugate.
    Dr. Scully: Happening as we sit here.
    O’Malley: It’s happening all around us.

& Dr. Scully: It’s fearmongering claptrap, isolationist techno-paranoia so bogus and dangerous and stupid... that it borders on treason.

& Mulder: Scully, are you ready for this?
    Dr. Scully: I don’t know there’s a choice.

& Cigarette Smoking Man: We have a small problem. They’ve reopened the X-Files.

--
+ quotes on the IMDb

Love Sick

Grimm 1×17


& Monroe: You know, how do you tell your partner he’s dating a witch? You mean so he doesn’t hate you? Not easy.

& Monroe: Looks like somebody took a bite out of the wrong apple, dude. Classic witch’s brew. Mojo, Juju, Hocus-Pocus, Booga Booga, whatever you want to call it.

& Capt. Renard: I don’t like it any more than you do. But sometimes the bigger picture is complicated by things beyond our control...


& Nick: It worked on Wu...
    Rosalee: He didn’t have sex with her.
    Monroe: Oh, God. That always complicates things, doesn’t it?

& Rosalee: The only way you can break a blood Zaubertrank is by killing the hexenbiest whose blood is in it.
    Nick: Well, I won’t have a problem with that.

--
+ quotes on the IMDb

Конни Уиллис — Даже у королевы / Последняя "Виннебаго" / Дилемма


Даже у королевы

“цитаты
  “Телефон зазвонил как раз в ту минуту, когда я наблюдала за тщетными попытками защиты закрыть дело. ...
&  Я как раз читала лекцию об Определении Независимой Личности, рассказывая студентам о неотъемлемом праве любого гражданина свободного общества делать из себя законченного болвана.

&  – И как идут переговоры, бабушка Карен? – поинтересовалась Виола.
     – Они шли достаточно хорошо. Израильтяне отдали палестинцам пол-Иерусалима и договорились вскоре поделить Голанские высоты.

&  Я часто удивляюсь, как моей свекрови удалось сделаться дипломатом. Трудно представить, чтобы она могла быть полезна на всех этих посреднических заседаниях со всякими сербами и католиками, протестантами и хорватами, Северной и Южной Кореей. Она примыкает сразу к обеим враждующим партиям, делает слишком поспешные выводы, неверно истолковывает любые доводы собеседника и отказывается кого-либо слушать. И все же Карен сумела так уболтать Южную Африку, что ее главой стал Мандела. Она же, вероятно, заставила палестинцев принять во внимание Йом Киппур. Наверное, она просто запугивает противника до состояния рабской покорности. Или, может быть, враждующие стороны объединяются для того, чтобы общими усилиями защититься от нее.
  ... Все-таки Виола права. Ты нам никогда ни о чем не рассказываешь!”


Последняя «Виннебаго»

  “Я ехал в Темпе и увидел на дороге мертвого шакала. ...
&  Фотографом работать не слишком весело. У большинства людей лица при виде камеры закрываются, словно ставни при слишком ярком солнце, и остается фотофизиономия, «лицо для публики». У всех почти улыбающееся, кроме, может быть, сенаторов и арабских террористов, но — с улыбкой или без улыбки — настоящие чувства оно скрывает. Хуже всего снимать актеров, политических деятелей — вообще тех, кто постоянно фотографируется. Чем привычнее для человека находиться на глазах у публики, тем легче снимать его с большого расстояния видеокамерой и тем труднее сделать снимок, хоть сколько-нибудь отражающий его суть.

&  Он держал руки на коленях и ждал — старый прием журналистов: если выдержать достаточно долгую паузу, собеседник скажет то, чего не собирался говорить, — лишь бы нарушить тишину.

&  Помни: выражай простодушную искренность.
  ... «Выбросить!» — скомандовал я, развернул ролик и засветил его.”


Дилемма

“цитаты
  “— Мы хотим видеть доктора Азимова, — объяснил причину своего визита синевато-серебристый робот. ...
&  — Да, сэр, но я должен сказать, что все Три Закона очень примитивны. Они нарушают первую заповедь логики и законотворчества тем, что не оговаривают условий, при которых действуют.
  ... — Она же любила своего босса, двух мнений тут быть не может.”

12 февр. 2016 г.

Welcome Home, Jake

Two and a Half Men 11×17


& Barry: Hey, Jeff Strongman looks good in that hat.
    Alan: Top of the day to you, too, sir.
    Walden: Wait, you can tell when he’s not Alan?
    Barry: Oh, yeah. Jeff exudes a quiet confidence. Whereas Alan... just exudes.

& Barry: Walden, I am loving it here. I mean, pizza, lesbians, weed scavenger hunts...


& Walden: Did you see that? Don’t be them! I only let you stay for a few days to help you transition.
    Barry: Okay, okay, I got another idea. Bacon-flavored eggs. All me and you got to figure out is how to make the chicken and the pig have sex.
    Jenny: Maybe you could show them the lesbian porn...

& Walden: Barry, listen to me! I’m gonna say something to you that I have never said before.... You can’t live with me!... My God. I did it! I’m sorry, you’re my first.
    Barry: No, no, I don’t wanna be your first! Your first should be special, like a whore your step-dad buys you... Is an example I just made up.

--
On the IMDb