Avengement (2019)

Mo: ...that nutter killed Rook.
Vern: Well, we all feel bad for him, bro. But I've got a business to run. Rook would be the first to agree with me, because whilst he was a bit of sadistic cunt, he was first and foremost a professional.

Cain Burgess: You must be a tough guy then, yeah? Chasin' that bloke away all by yourself. It's funny, that. You don't look like a tough guy to me.
Tune: Well, what's a fucking tough guy look like then?!
Cain Burgess: Well, they look like me, don't they? You know, handsome, well-aged.

Lincoln Burgess: Cain, I have a few very simple rules that I live my life by. And they've served me double well over the years. One of 'em is never, ever, ever lend money to family. ... You see, little bruv, lending money is what I do. I mean, what happens if you can't pay me back, and your business plan goes fucking backside? We don't wanna come after you and seriously hurt you.

Cain Burgess: ... So as the months and the weeks rolled by, I slowly but surely turned myself into what you see before you now. A hardened, rusty nail.

Cain Burgess: You see, the body can be strengthened to a degree, but it's your mind that makes you impervious to defeat. Just like the skin on your knuckles, the mind can be made callous as fuck. Bodily pain can do that. So I learned how to take pain. But, more importantly, I learned how to dish it out.

Lincoln Burgess: You're gonna die in here tonight, Cain. You got two barrels. There's ten of us.
Cain Burgess: I only need one to blow your fuckin' head apart.

Lincoln Burgess: You know, there's a million nerves in the human body. And you, as my brother, my fucking brother, you have always, since the day you were fucking born, got on every, single fucking one of 'em.

Cain Burgess: Cheers, guys.

Cain Burgess: You see, that's what happens when you get other people to do your dirty work. You forget to check the gun to see if it's loaded.

--
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Σ nostradamvs: «На удивление нормальный, видимо, потому что британский, боевик со Скоттом Адкинсом, которому его и так не особо красивую физиономию подувечили дополнительно с помощью новой челюсти. По сюжету он был такой простой парень, а его брат - бандюга; брат подставил Адкинса, а потом нанял пацанов убить того в тюрьме, и 7 лет Адкинс в тюрьме дрался, дрался, дрался, дрался и выжил. И стал пуленепробиваемым. И дальше он выходит и всех врагов мочит, а всем хорошим отдаёт деньги плохих. Драки поставлены круто, но герои уж слишком неубиваемы - после нескольких ножевых дерутся, как будто только-только начали. Такие нормальные британские 90-е.»

Нил Стивенсон — Интерфейс (2/6)

<< Начало

&  – Сынок, я работаю на императоров. В восемнадцатом веке политика целиком строилась на идеях, но потом появился Джефферсон с целой кучей новых идей. В девятнадцатом веке политика строилась на личности. Но никто не демонстрировал такой силы личности, как Линкольн и Ли. Большую часть двадцатого века она крутилась вокруг харизмы. Но теперь никто не верит в харизму, поскольку Гитлер использовал ее, чтобы убивать евреев, а ДФК – чтобы клеить телок и отправлять нас во Вьетнам.
     – И что же сейчас?
     – Внимательность. Мы живем в Эпоху Внимательности. Публичная фигура должна выдержать внимание прессы. Президент – высшая публичная фигура и должна выдерживать самое пристальное внимание; он подобен человеку, растянутому на дыбе на площади в какой-нибудь средневековой жопе мира и испытуемому Инквизицией. Как и средневековье, Эпоха Внимания плюет на рациональные доводы и дискуссии, а клятвы и протесты считает ложью и обманом. Единственный способ установить правду – это ритуалы испытания, которые создают в подследственном такое нечеловеческое напряжение, что любой изъян его характера становится роковым, и он раскалывается, как треснувший алмаз. Это мистическая процедура, апеллирующая к высшим, не называемым силам, и отрицающая рациональность, каковая считается работой Дьявола. Как римские гаруспики, которые предсказывали итог битвы, не изучая силы противника, но ковыряясь в дымящихся потрохах жертвенного барана, мы пытаемся установить готовность кандидата к отправлению должности, скрестив на нем лучи прожекторов в телестудии и подсчитывая, сколько раз в минуту он мигает, деконструируя его способность смотреть прямо в глаза, отслеживая его жестикуляцию – открыты или сжаты его ладони, направлены ли они к камере или от нее, распахнуты или скрючены, как клешни.
     Я набросал угнетающую картину. Но мы с вами подобны обученным грамоте монахам, которые в течение всех Темных Веков нянчили огонек греческой рациональности, скрываясь в подполье, узнавая друг друга по тайным знакам и кодовым словам, встречаясь в подвалах и чащобах, чтобы обмениваться опасными, подрывными идеями. У нас недостаточно сил, чтобы изменить образ мыслей безграмотного большинства. Но у нас довольно хитроумия, чтобы пользоваться их глупостью, чтобы изучать их несложные мыслительные механизмы и использовать эти знания, чтобы исподволь направлять их к цели, кавычки открываются, верной и истинной, кавычки закрываются.

&  – Вы когда-нибудь попадали в телевизор, Аарон?
     – Только случайно.
     – И как вы при этом выглядели?
     – Не очень хорошо. То есть у меня был настолько дикий вид, что это просто шокировало.
     – Вы пучили глаза, не так ли?
     – Именно. Как вы догадались?
     – Кривая гаммы определяет, как камера реагирует на свет. Если она близка к прямой, то темное выглядит темным, а светлое – светлым, как в реальности и более-менее на каждой приличной кинопленке. Но поскольку эта кривая никогда не бывает прямой, темное стремится к черному, а яркое начинает бликовать и засвечиваться; только то, что посредине, выглядит туда-сюда. Так вот, у вас темные глаза, и притом глубоко посаженные, и в результате они уходят в черный. Белки глаз, по контрасту, кажутся чересчур яркими. Зная все это, вы бы старались смотреть прямо перед собой, чтобы как можно меньше показывать белки. Но поскольку вы не искушены в этих материях, то переводили глаза с предмета на предмет и белки при этом «вспыхивали», выпрыгивая из экрана – все из-за кривой гаммы; ваши глаза выглядели выпученными белыми сферами на грязноватом темном фоне.
     – Этому вы и учите политиков?
     – Это всего лишь пример.

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The Old Guard (2020)

Copley: Has to be done quickly... by the best, and your team's the best I've ever seen. You can name your price.
Andy: We'll invoice you when it's done.

Andy: The world can burn for all I care. I'm done.

Nile: Who are you?
Andy: Andromache the Scythian. But you can call me Andy.

Andy: Why does it have to be so goddamn slow the first couple of times?

Andy: Listen, kid. You already believe in... You should just keep following that illogic. You're already on board with the supernatural.

Nile: So are you good guys or bad guys?
Booker: Depends on the century.
Andy: We fight for what we think is right.

Nile: So how old are you?
Andy: Old.
Nile: How old?
Andy: Too old.
Nile: So we really never die.
Booker: Nothing that lives lives forever.

Nile: Andy did all this herself?
Booker: Yeah. That woman has forgotten more ways to kill than entire armies will ever learn.

Andy: We don't get a say in when it ends. We never have. But we can control how we live.

--
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Нил Стивенсон — Интерфейс

  “Кабинет Уильяма Энтони Коззано – это чистый скандал! – кричали в управляющем совете Исторического общества штата Иллинойс. ...

&  – У этой страны проблемы. Кто-то должен их решить, иначе все ее инвесторы прогорят.
     – Инвесторы?
     – Ага. Раньше у Америки были граждане. Потом правительство выставило ее на продажу. Теперь у нее инвесторы. Мы с тобой работаем на инвесторов.

&  – Если хочешь знать: когда-то, когда люди еще верили в ценности этой страны, она работала как часы.
     – О каких ценностях ты говоришь?
     – Это кодовое обозначение таких вещей, как честность, тяжкий труд и вера в свои силы. Собственно, это мифы, которое позволяли людям принять естественное неравенство, возникающее в рыночной системе. В старые времена договор был свят: развод, банкротство, мошенничество являлись табу для среднего человека. Разумеется, бандиты, короли преступности были выше табу. Мы должны вернуть страну к этим ценностям, чтобы ни у кого даже мысли не возникло, что можно отказаться от возврата долга.

&  Немного позора может помочь от депрессии.

&  Мэри Кэтрин обладала способностью выкидывать плохие вещи из головы, чтобы они не замутняли ее суждений. Этому еще в детстве ее научил отец, а во время учебы в университете, когда мать заболела лейкемией и умерла, она прошла жестокий повторный курс.

&  – И в чем заключается скам?
     – «Скам», знаешь ли – это всего лишь «схема» на идиш – слово «план» звучит гораздо благороднее. Так что давайте оставим этот пренебрежительный тон. Давайте говорить «план».

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The One with Russ

Friends 2×10

Monica: Public display of affection coming up. You can avert your eyes.

Russ: You're jealous because I'm a real doctor.
Ross: Hey, you're a doctor of gums. That's the smallest body part you can major in. It's like day one, floss, day two, here's your diploma.

Chandler: So, what are you gonna do?
Joey: I guess I could sleep with her. I mean... How can I do that?
Chandler: Well, I've got a pop-up book that told me everything I needed to know.
Joey: I've never slept with someone for a part.
Ross: Well, is she...? Is she good-looking?
Joey: Yeah. She's totally good-looking. I mean, if I met her in a bar or something... I'd be buying her breakfast. You know, after having slept with her.

Chandler: You know, maybe this isn't such a big deal. I mean, the way that I see it is, you get a great job and you get to have sex. You know? Throw in a tree and a fat guy, and you've got Christmas.
Joey: I just... I just don't think that I want it that way though, you know? I mean, let's say I do make it, all right? I'm always gonna look back and wonder if it was because of my talent... or because of, you know, the little general.
Chandler: Didn't you used to call it the little major?
Joey: Yeah, but after Denise DeMarco, I had to promote it.

--
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Mindhorn (2016)

Richard's Agent: Just calm down and sit down.
Richard Thorncroft: I don't want to sit down.
Richard's Agent: Then stand up, but calm down.
Richard Thorncroft: I'll sit down.
Richard's Agent: Sit down, then.

Richard Thorncroft: Mindhorn makes people wait. And when they wait, they become angry and they become vulnerable, and when they're vulnerable, they make mistakes. Yo, what's going down?

Richard Thorncroft: The only present I'm interested in is the truth. And don't bother wrapping it, because I don't care for pretty packaging.
Paul Melly: How do I know this is really you?
Richard Thorncroft: How do I know it's really you, Kestrel, and not some insane, mental nutjob?
Paul Melly: Why would you say that? I'm the Kestrel! More people are going to die.
Richard Thorncroft: We're all going to die. Get over it. Some with a bang, some with a whimper, some with a weird wasting disease.
Paul Melly: Oh, it really is you.
Richard Thorncroft: Gold star, Kestrel! Now tell me something I don't already bloody know.

--
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Caballo de Troya

Money Heist 1×4

El Profesor: When you were a child, what games did you play in the playground?
Raquel: With... the jump rope, hitting the can, the donkey... I played ladybirds too. I was very good at that.
El Profesor: I played cops and robbers. Is it familiar? Some of us played cops and had to catch the others and when they got you, they got you, but Raquel: I don't remember a single child in that playground who surrendered before he was caught.

Raquel: It'll won't be easy to get the green light to your requests, due to... logistic issues, safety issues....
El Profesor: Imagine this: a building collapses and there are 67 people inside. How many arrangements do you think they would approve to save the lives of those innocent people?... Inspector, let's be clear. You only have two choices. One: to punish us. Two: to save lives. And I'm afraid you can't choose both things.

El Profesor: ... I'll give you those 67 hostages in perfect health, when we are in international waters. And I assure that's not the first choice I had. I hate the sea, the fish and the sand on the beach. But life don't always give you an easy way out, don't you think?

Raquel: He's in control, because he knows everything goes according to plan.
Coronel Prieto: What plan is better than going out with the eight millions of the safe vault?
Raquel: ... They're printing their own unmarked money.

Tokio: A thief is, by definition, an inveterate optimist. They always think everything will be all right...

El Profesor: I apologize. But I see you and... And it doesn't fit. It's not what I imagine when I think about...
About what? A battered woman? Because I've got a gun, right? Listen, the reality is that... it doesn't start with a smack. In that case, nobody would be with a violent man. It's the other way round. You're... You fall in love with a charming and intelligent man... who makes you feel the centre of the universe. And when he asks you to change your profile picture and use a picture of your daughter, you think it's tender. And when he tells you not to wear a miniskirt to work, you think: "I'm a woman who works in a men's world, he's actually protecting me." And then one day... he raises his voice... Look, it's like... It's like going down steps little by little. Like in those horror films where somebody goes down to the basement and everybody thinks: "Don't go downstairs. Don't do it." But you do it. That's where I got the first slap. And then the second, and the third...

Berlín: If you don't start having a cool head, forget about the millions, Acapulco and the garden full of children, because you'll screw all up. You only have to do one thing: be professionals.
Nairobi: Doesn't this seem professional to you?
Berlín: Precious.
Nairobi: No, not precious. A fucking note better than the ones in the bank. They can't even trace it. A work of art. And you know why?
Berlín: Enlighten me, Nairobi.
Nairobi: Because it's been made with care. I'm a professional.

--
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It Comes at Night (2017)

Paul: When we're inside the house, the door to the back room stays closed and locked, ... And the door leading to the back room also stays closed and locked, all the time, the red door. I have the keys, the only set. Or Sarah will have them. Um... It's the only way in and out of the house. Everything else you see is all boarded up. Um... Most important thing, we never go out at night, unless it's an absolute emergency. And even when we do go out during the day, we like to stick to groups of two just for safety, you know, collecting wood or water, whatnot.

Paul: Good people, huh?
Travis: Yes. I like them here.
Paul: Well, you just keep it in perspective, okay? I don't need to tell you, but... you can't trust anyone, but family. As good as they seem. Just don't forget that, okay?

Paul: I was a teacher... History.
Will: Get outta here.
Paul: Yeah, you want to know all about the Roman Empire? I'm your guy.

Sarah: It's gonna be okay. You can let go. You can let go...

--
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The One with Phoebe's Dad

Friends 2×9

Phoebe: Ooh, ooh, ooh. Ugly Naked Guy is decorating his tree. Oh, my God, you should see the size of his Christmas balls!

Joey: I can't believe it's Christmas already. You know? One day you're eating turkey, the next thing you know... your lords are a-leaping and your geese are a-laying. Heh.

Ross: How about you make a list about me?
Rachel: Forget it. I'm not gonna stand here... and make a list... Okay, you're whiny... you are obsessive, you are insecure... you're gutless.
Ross: Heh.
Rachel: You don't ever just seize the day. You liked me for a year and you didn't do anything about it! And, uh... Oh, you wear too much of that gel in your hair.

Phoebe: Can you believe this? In like two hours I'm gonna have a dad.

Phoebe: Here, you have to hold this.
Chandler: Okay... "Brake, left. Gas, right"?
Phoebe: Uh-huh, that's my cheat sheet.

Ross: Hey. Hey. Come on, just tell me. Please, please.
Monica: For the 16th time, no, I do not think you're obsessive.

Ross: All right. You know how you say I never seize the day? Even though he's your super, I'm seizing... Mr. Treeger? Here is 50 bucks. Merry Christmas.
Mr. Treeger: Oh, wow. I didn't get you anything. Here's five back.

Phoebe: You know what? I've already lost a fake dad this week. I don't think I'm ready to lose a real one.

--
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Normal People #1.2

Marianne: Don't think "cool" is the first word most people would associate with me.
Connell: What would that be, then?
Marianne: I don't know. Annoying. Obnoxious. Argumentative, definitely. Self-righteous is probably one. Uh, arrogant. Frigid--

Connell: You think I'm shy? Just because I don't give my opinion on everything all the time--
Marianne: You never give an opinion about anything. Ever.
Connell: You just always know what you think. I'm not like that.
Marianne: You must know what you feel, though.
Connell: No. I struggle with that, actually. I might look back on something and... think how I felt at the time, but... when it's happening, never have any idea.
Marianne: Then how do you know what you want?
Connell: I don't. Most of the time I don't have a clue.

Connell: Sure the whole Deb thing's a joke, anyway. Don't know why they still do it.
Marianne: Point at any patriarchal structure in the world and say that.

Connell: All right. I'll put down English and Trinity. So...
Marianne: Really?
Connell: Yeah. Who gives a fuck about a job, anyways?

--
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Land of Mine (2015)

Captain Ebbe Jensen: For all those who don't know why they're here, you've been brought to Denmark to clean up after the war. Denmark is not your friend. Make sure you understand that. Don't expect the Danish people to welcome you with open arms. No one wants to see Germans here. You only serve one purpose for us. To clear Denmark's west coast of German landmines. Mines that you brought here. Approximately 2.2 million landmines are buried along the Danish west coast. That's more than in all the other European countries...

Sgt. Carl Rasmussen: Can you all see the black flag down there?
— Yes, Sergeant!
Sgt. Carl Rasmussen: Between the black flag and the trail 45,000 mines are buried. You will defuse all of them. When you're finished, you're free to go home. Is that understood?
— Yes, sir!
Sgt. Carl Rasmussen: Only then can you go home. Understood?
— Yes, Sergeant!
Sgt. Carl Rasmussen: Assuming you defuse six mines an hour and don't blow yourself up, you'll be home in three months. Is that understood?
— Yes, Sergeant!

Sgt. Carl Rasmussen: You should have told me that I was getting little boys, Ebbe. It changes the situation somewhat.
Captain Ebbe Jensen: I don't think so. If you're old enough to go to war, you're old enough to clean up your mess.
Sgt. Carl Rasmussen: These boys haven't got a clue.
Captain Ebbe Jensen: No? So fill them in, Carl. That's your job. You're not beginning to like them, are you?
Sgt. Carl Rasmussen: No.
Captain Ebbe Jensen: Remember what they did. Rather them than us.

--
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Eurovision Song Contest: The Story of Fire Saga (2020)

Lars Erickssong: He's right. My father is ashamed of me.
Sigrit Ericksdottir: No, he's not. That's not true.
Lars Erickssong: No, it is true. After you left, he looked me deep into the eyes and said, "I am ashamed of you."
Sigrit Ericksdottir: Oh, I don't know if that's...
Lars Erickssong: And then, he said, "You have wasted your whole life on this one stupid idea of the Eurovision Song Contest. And now you're a grown man without a wife? Without a child? Your life is a joke."
Sigrit Ericksdottir: Maybe he was drunk...
Lars Erickssong: No. He said, "And you might think that I'm drunk, but I am dead sober. And I'm very serious."

Sigrit Ericksdottir: Why?
Lars Erickssong: We can't.  We have to think about the music.
Sigrit Ericksdottir: Oh, yes...
Lars Erickssong: Right? But we can make music and love.
Sigrit Ericksdottir: No, we can't.
Lars Erickssong: Mmm.
Sigrit Ericksdottir: Really? Just...
Lars Erickssong: No. Romance, it ruins the bands. Think about it. Fleetwood Mac, right? ABBA, Post Malone, Semen and Garfunkel.
Sigrit Ericksdottir: Yeah, I forgot about Semen and Garfunkel.

Stephan: What are you doing?
Lars Erickssong: I'm taking this rope that's loose and I'm rolling it around to make it like in a circle. I'm going to become a fisherman. And drink myself to death like a real Erickssong man. This is my new life.
Stephan: But what about Sigrit?
Lars Erickssong: Rich, hairless Russian guy with a huge dingle-dong came between us.
Stephan: Shit happens.
Lars Erickssong: Yeah. Goodbye. Remember, give up on your dreams now while you're still young.

---

Alexander Lemtov: Why don't you stay with me after the contest?
Sigrit Ericksdottir: Oh... Alexander, we barely know each other.
Alexander Lemtov: Yes, but you are beautiful and kind. I handsome and rich. This is typically  very winning combination.

Sigrit Ericksdottir: Um... uh... Lemtov, I need to ask you something.
Alexander Lemtov: Sure, sure.
Sigrit Ericksdottir: Okay. Uh... Are you gay?
Alexander Lemtov: What? No! No, no! Of course not! I am Russian!
Sigrit Ericksdottir: No?
Alexander Lemtov: There no gay people in Russia.
Sigrit Ericksdottir: Statistically speaking, I think that's impossible.
Alexander Lemtov: I assure you. Hundred percent.
Sigrit Ericksdottir: Gender-fluid?
Alexander Lemtov: Fact of truth. No gay Russian.
Sigrit Ericksdottir: Non-binary?
Alexander Lemtov: No, non-binary. I, he, him pronoun. He, him.

--
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Megan Leavey (2017)

Megan Leavey: In the end, you don't leave because you have somewhere to go. You leave because there's nothing keeping you there.

Megan Leavey: Master Sergeant, I'm sorry...
Master Sergeant: Shut up. Don't mess with me, it brings out my Irish.

Master Sergeant: Why are you here in the Marines? You don't know, do you? Well, I do. You think you're the first entitled brat with a chip on her shoulder who's come through my ranks? This institution is for heroes, not little punks all screwed up in the head because their mommies and daddies didn't love them enough. But you're in my corps now, and I will not see you disrespect the men and women who made the Marines great!

Megan Leavey: You think I'm afraid of you? Okay. I am afraid of you. But don't think I can't make you afraid of me, too.

Megan Leavey: Gunny, how do I become a dog handler?
Gunny Martin: You?
Megan Leavey: Yeah. What do I have to do exactly?
Gunny Martin: For starters, you need to stop screwing up. Then, you'll need an expert rifle score, above 90% on all your exams, a first class PFT, and you know who gets those things? People who aren't full of shit.

Gunny Martin: They aren't pets. They aren't even dogs anymore. They're warriors, and they come back with all the same issues we do.

Bob: Baby, I know that you feel like you lost everything. I know what that feels like. But the thing is, you gotta keep living.
Megan Leavey: I am living.
Bob: No, you're not. This isn't living. You gotta figure out what it would take to make it worth it.
Megan Leavey: Rex would be worth it.

Bob: There are a few people in life, not many, that you gotta find a way for. If you needed something, I would do whatever it took, not because I'm any kind of great dad, but because how I love you is stronger than what I'm not. I want you to be a person who shows up for work, for your friends' funerals, for life.
Megan Leavey: I've tried, I failed.
Bob: So fail again. And just keep failing until they're tossing dirt on your corpse. Baby, all you gotta do is fight, and you know how to fight. You're a frickin' Marine.

--
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Beyond the Aquila Rift

Love, Death & Robots 1×7

Greta: It's okay, Thom. You're here now. That's all that matters.

Greta: I always think men are sexiest when they try and think.

Greta: I don't want to hurt you, Thom.
Thom: I just need to know what's going on here. I need to see. I need to see this place. I need to see you as you really are.
Greta: You're not ready. Trust me...
Thom: Show me, God damn it!
Greta: All right, Thom. But understand this: I do care for you. I care for all the lost souls that end up here.

Greta: You're in Saumlaki Station, Schedar Sector.
Thom: Schedar Sector? But... that's hundreds of light years off our course.
Greta: Yes, it is. But, hey, at least there's a friendly face here.

--
On the IMDb
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The One with the List

Friends 2×8

Rachel: Ross kissed me! ....
Monica: We wanna hear everything!
Phoebe: Monica, get the wine and unplug the phone.

Phoebe: Okay. All right. Let's hear about the kiss. Was it like a soft brush against your lips... or was it like a, you know, "I gotta have you now" kind of thing?
Rachel: Well, at first it was really intense, you know? And then... Oh, God. And then we just sort of sunk into it.
Phoebe: Oh... So, okay, was he holding you? Or were his hands on your back?
Rachel: No, actually, ahem, first they started out on my waist... and then they slid up and then they were in my hair.
Monica: Oh.
Phoebe: Oh.

Ross: And, uh... And then I kissed her.
Joey: Tongue?

Chandler: All right, check out this bad boy! Twelve megabytes of RAM, 500-megabyte hard drive... built-in spreadsheet capabilities... and a modem that transmits at over 28,000 BPS.
Joey: Wow. What are you gonna use it for?
Chandler: Games and stuff.

Monica: There are no jobs. There are no jobs for me.
Joey: Oh, wait, here's one. Uh... Would you be willing to cook naked?
Monica: There's an ad for a naked chef?
Joey: No, but if you're willing to cook naked, then you might be willing to dance naked. And then...

Chandler: Don't ever touch the computer!

---

Joey: Ross, listen. I got two words for you: Threesome.

Chandler: Let's get logical about this. We'll make a list. "Rachel and Julie: Pros and Cons." We'll put their names in bold with different fonts... and I can use different colors for each column--
Ross: Can't we just use a pen?
Chandler: No, Amish boy. Let's start with the cons because they're more fun.

Chandler: Okay, let's do Julie. What's wrong with her?
Ross: She's... not Rachel.

Chandler: I'm telling you, this thing won't print... Yes, I pressed that button, like, 100 times!... You know, for a hotline, you're not so hot.

Ross: You know what? If things were the other way around, there is nothing you could put on a list... that would ever make me not wanna be with you.
Rachel: Well, then I guess that's the difference between us. See, I'd never make a list.
Joey: .... I never know how long you're supposed to wait in this situation before you can talk.
Chandler: Maybe a little longer.

Mr. Rastatter: Thanks for coming in again.
Monica: Oh, not at all. I have no morals, and I need the cash.
Mr. Rastatter: It's like I'm looking in a mirror... Anyway, they're called Fish-tachios. Now, they taste exactly like pistachios... but they're made of reconstituted fish bits. Here, try one.

--
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Queen & Slim (2019)

Slim: To be honest, I don't have many photos of myself.
Queen: Why not?
Slim: I know what I look like.
Queen: Pictures aren't just about vanity. They're proof of your existence.
Slim: My family know I exist. That's enough.

Slim: Now we ain't got no phones.
Queen: Phone ain't nothing but a tracking device anyway.

Slim: I'm not a criminal.
Queen: You are now.
Slim: I just want to go home, and I want to see my family. If you turn yourself in, you will never see them again. All we can do is go forward. There is nothing back there for us.

Slim: You're lying.
Queen: How do you know?
Slim: You answered too fast.
Queen: Come on, man! I thought, if a person answered quickly, that meant they were telling the truth.
Slim: My dad always told me the person that answers too quickly had a lie ready to go.
Queen: Well, that's good to know.
Slim: How you know if your clients are telling the truth?
Queen: I don't.
Slim: Then how can you defend 'em?
Queen: That's my job.
Slim: Are you a good lawyer?
Queen: Come on! I'm an excellent lawyer.
Slim: Why do black people always feel the need to be excellent? Why can't we just be ourselves?

Large Black Man: Power to the people.

---

Slim: You're not shaving my head.
Uncle Earl: Fine. You can choose. You're a woman. I believe in a woman's right to choose... But you ain't shit. Use the cheap razor on his ass.

Slim: What if God wanted me to die and I messed up his plan?
Queen: I don't think that's what he wanted.
Slim: How do you know?
Queen: I just... I just think you were meant to be here.

Slim: It's beautiful out here.
Queen: .... Is it?
Slim: I'm just trying to make conversation.
Queen: I'm just being honest.
Slim: Oh. You have to be honest all the time?
Queen: Do you want me to be silent?

Slim: What do you want?
Queen: I want a guy to show me myself. I want him to love me so deeply I'm not afraid to show him how ugly I can be. I want him to show me scars I never knew I had. But I don't want him to make them go away. I want him to hold my hand while I nurse them myself. And I want him to cherish the bruises they leave behind.

Queen: What do you want?
Slim: I want a ride-or-die.
Queen: Oh, my God. What does that even mean?
Slim: I just want someone that's always gonna love me no matter what. Someone that's gonna hold my hand and never let it go. She got to be special, though. 'Cause she gonna be my legacy.
Queen: What do you mean?
Slim: Look, I ain't gonna bend the world. Long as my lady remembers me fondly, that's all I need.

--
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The One Where Ross Finds Out

Friends 2×7

Chandler: Okay. What is it about me? Do I not look fun enough? Is there something repellent about me?

Monica: Yo, Bing! Racquetball in 20 minutes.
Chandler: Joey, be a pal. Lift up my hand and smack her with it.

Phoebe: Ooh. Oh, Rachel! Don't look.

Rachel: Cats. How long do they live? Figuring you don't throw them under a bus or something?

Ross: You're over me?
Rachel: Oh, God, oh, God, oh, God. Oh, my God. Oh...
Ross: When...? When were you... under me?

Phoebe: How come you're watching a rabbi play electric guitar?
Joey: I can't find the remote.

Joey: Let me get this straight. He got you to beg to sleep with him. He got you to say he never has to call you again. And he got you thinking this is a great idea?
Phoebe: Uh-huh.
Joey: This man is my god!

---

Chandler: Monica, it's 6:30 in the morning. We're not working out. It's over.
Monica: No way! With one pound to go? Come on! We're workin', we're movin' We're in the zone, we're groovin'
Chandler: Okay, I don't mind the last pound. In fact, I kind of like the last pound. So don't make me do anything that I'll regret.
Monica: Ha, oh, what you gonna do, fat boy, huh? Ha, ha.
Chandler: What? Heh. Nothing. Except tell you, uh, it's wonderful how much energy you have.
Monica: Well, thanks.
Chandler: Especially considering how tough it's been for you to find work.
Monica: Well, you know. Heh.
Chandler: You know, I mean... you can't tell your parents you were fired, because they'd be disappointed.
Monica: Uh-huh.
Chandler: It's not as if you have a boyfriend's shoulder to cry on.
Monica: Well, no. But I...
Chandler: I mean... if it were me, I'd have difficulty getting out of bed at all.
Monica: You know, I try to stay positive...
Chandler: So you?... You feel like going for a run? All right. Because you don't have to. You could just take a nap right here.
Monica: Okay. Just for a little while.
Chandler: Okay.

--
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Murder Mystery (2019)

Jimmy Stern: Come on, man. You know I'll lie for you anytime. I will cover up dead bodies for you. But if I ask Holly to lie to your wife, there's no way we're messing around. It's Freaky Friday!
Nick Spitz: You don't have to lie, just tell her to ignore when I'm lying. That's it.

Marisol: Or maybe you could just text him, airplane, wine glass, Italian flag, eggplant, doughnut, doughnut, doughnut.

Nick Spitz: I don't want to give it away... It was the butler. The butler did it.
Audrey Spitz: It's never the butler who did it.
Nick Spitz: I don't even think there are butlers. That's just a word created for those goofy books you're addicted to.

Nick Spitz: You're an actress, right?
Grace Ballard: All women are actresses, dear. I'm just clever enough to get paid for it.

Audrey Spitz: No. No way. Not a chance. It's too obvious. The most obvious suspect is never, never the killer.
Nick Spitz: The most obvious suspect is always the killer. When a wife gets killed, 90% of the time it was the husband.
Audrey Spitz: Why did you just use that as an example? And I disagree. I think people are more complicated than that.
Nick Spitz: Judging off of what? Those books that you read? People are simple, okay?

Nick Spitz: So, here's what we do...
Audrey Spitz: What are you talking about? What are you doing?!
Nick Spitz: They can't track our SIM card now.
Audrey Spitz: Yeah, then pull the SIM card out. You don't just submerge our phones into a bucket of beer.

Audrey Spitz: Jesus! Oh, my God. It's just like Death at the Library!
Nick Spitz: What happens in Death at the Library?
Audrey Spitz: They died. That's why it's called Death at the Library.

--
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Σ pita4og: «... В целом миленькое, простенькое и очень красивое кино. Такой веселый старомодный детективчик, стилизованный под курортные детективные сериалы 80-90-х.»

>> Murder Mystery 2 (2023)

The Long, Hot Summer (1958)

Eula Varner: Our little town's the most nowhere place in the state of Mississippi. You can believe me when I tell you it laces you in tight as a corset. And as far as social amusements are concerned, there are none.
Ben Quick: Well, that's all right. I'm a quiet-livin' man myself.
Eula Varner: I only know one reason for living quiet. That's if you're too old to live any other way.

Ben Quick: How does a man make a living around here?
Ratliff: Honest or dishonest?
Ben Quick: Let me hear what's open.

Jody Varner: A fellow name of Quick.
Will Varner: Quick? Ben Quick?
Jody Varner: Yeah, yeah, from out west.
Will Varner: You knucklehead fool! You empty-headed yokel!
Jody Varner: What are you calling me names for?
Will Varner: "Quick!" Don't you keep abreast of anything except Eula? Don't you know what Quick means in this county? Hellfire! Ashes and char! Flame follows that man around like a dog! He's a barn burner.
Jody Varner: I never do anything right. Do I?
Will Varner: Not to my immediate recollection!

Clara Varner: I'll tell you, Mr. Quick. The last time I parted with my money to a pitchman, I was 12 years old.
Ben Quick: And nobody's ever taken you since.
Clara Varner: Nope. Nobody ever will.
Ben Quick: Well, life's very long and full of salesmanship, Miss Clara. You might buy somethin' yet...

Will Varner: Boy, you got something belongs to me.
Ben Quick: You ain't no better than a crook.
Will Varner: Well, you ain't nothin' better than a con man. You sell my crooked merchandise.
Ben Quick: Never mind the name-calling. Now, where's my share?

Will Varner: What do you do out here, you and Alan, huh?
Clara Varner: We talk.
Will Varner: What gets said? Anything important?
Clara Varner: He thinks I'm a nice, quiet, self-contained girl.
Will Varner: Well, that ain't damn near enough! Thousands of acres out there, millions of seeds put down in the ground. Every year the seeds come up again. Life goes on. Where's "my" crop, huh? What follows me? What happens when I'm dead?
Clara Varner: You'll probably have the biggest funeral in the state of Mississippi.
Will Varner: That don't scare me, so long as there's plenty of Varners to mourn me.
Clara Varner: Jody and I will be there.
Will Varner: You and Jody, and Jody's kids, and yours, and their kids! My descendants, sister. A line. A long line with my face stamped on 'em, my blood flowing in their veins.

Ben Quick: We got all kinds of nostrums and remedies. 'Course, I don't have headaches myself. 'Cause I don't have any problems.
Clara Varner: Or scruples.
Ben Quick: Nope, not those either.
Clara Varner: Well, I have both.
Ben Quick: You got a thin skin is what you got. But the world belongs to the meat eaters, Miss Clara... and if you have to take it raw, take it raw.

Clara Varner: All right. You proved it. I'm human.
Ben Quick: Yes, ma'am, you're human all right.
Clara Varner: Barn burner!

---

Ben Quick: Well, I'll be damned.
Will Varner: More than probable you will be... but first you're goin' to church and get married, ya hear?

Will Varner: Who says I picked the wrong man? You and me got a deal, Ben Quick.
Ben Quick: And who says marriages are made in heaven?
Will Varner: All of hell wouldn't have this one!

Ben Quick: Well, just so we don't crowd each other... I shave nights and shower mornings.

Clara Varner: You are barkin' up the wrong girl, Mr. Quick... because it will never be you.
Ben Quick: Never say never.

Ben Quick: It's gonna be you and me.
Clara Varner: Not the longest day I live.
Ben Quick: Yes, sir. They're gonna say, "There goes that poor old Clara Varner... whose father married her off to a dirt-scratchin', shiftless... no-good farmer who just happened by." Well, let 'em talk. I'll tell you one thing. You gonna wake up in the mornin' smilin'.
Clara Varner: That's not enough. Do you understand me? That is not nearly enough. Mr. Quick, I am a human being. Do you know what that means? It means I set a price on myself, a high, high price. You may be surprised to know it... but I've got quite a lot to give. I've got things I have been savin' up my whole life... things like love and understanding and... and jokes and good times and good cooking. I'm prepared to be the queen of Sheba for some lucky man... or at the very least, the best wife that any man could hope for. Now, that's my human history... and it's not gonna be bought and sold... and it's certainly not gonna be given away to any passin' stranger.
Ben Quick: All right. Then run, lady. And you keep on runnin'! Buy yourself a bus ticket and disappear. Change your name, dye your hair, get lost! And then maybe... just maybe... you're gonna be safe from me.

Will Varner: Parents and children. I asked myself, "What are children for? Why do we have 'em?" Well, tonight I know. Now I know.
Clara Varner: Do ya?
Will Varner: Oh, I know I been hard on ya... but... don't feel you been pushed. You're goin' in the right direction. Woman's only half a thing without a man.
Clara Varner: What do you know about women, Papa?
Will Varner: I had the best. Your mother and I were just... about as close as... two people ever get together. I wanted to be with that woman all the time... look at her, listen to her... touch her. She lit up the whole world for me. I'll tell you somethin' remarkable. That woman loved me. She did, Clara. You find that hard to believe about me? A ugly, fat old redneck like me? Now, tell me, baby. Have I done wrong with you? I mean... imposin' my will on you... shovin' you this way and the other? Sometimes the strong just roll over the weak.
Clara Varner: Sometimes, Papa.

Will Varner: You got yourself a blue suit? Get it cleaned! You got some black shoes? Have 'em polished! Get yourself a haircut! You're gonna be married!

Will Varner: You'll find him at the store, sister! Get yourself down there. Now. Just say one word: Yes.

Ben Quick: You're a hardheaded, softhearted woman, Miss Clara... and I like you a lot.

Ben Quick: Well... you couldn't "tame" me, but you "taught" me.

Will Varner: Thank you. Man's got friends like you, he ain't got no trouble!

Ben Quick: I've been a little long comin' around to it, but... Well, life's a pretty valuable thing... and it ought to be treated with a certain amount of respect. You're old enough to know that, and I'm young enough to learn it.

Will Varner: Oh, Minnie, it sure is good to be alive this summer evenin'. Yeah, alive with friends and family... and a big healthy woman to love ya. Oh, I "like" life, Minnie. Yeah. I like it so much... I might just live forever.

--
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The One with the Baby on the Bus

Friends 2×6

Rachel: But what about Phoebe?
Terry: Rachel, uh, it's not that your friend is bad. It's that she's so bad... she makes me want to put my finger through my eye into my brain... and swirl it around.
Rachel: Okay, so you're not a fan.

Joey: No, no. No. We're two heterosexual guys hanging with the son... of our other heterosexual friend, doing the usual straight-guy stuff.

Phoebe: So, um, are you the professional guitar player?
Stephanie: Yeah, I'm Stephanie.
Phoebe: Oh, right. My name was on there, but now it just says carrot cake.

--
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